Writers Tricks of the Trade ISSUE 1, VOLUME 9 - Page 33

J IS FOR JUGGLING M ORGAN S T . J AMES E XCERPT FROM THE W RITERS T RICKS OF THE T RADE B OOK How to keep all the balls in the air ~ Hats you wear before and after publication L et’s assume you’re still deep in the dream from the last chapter. Since it’s a dream, why not go for broke? Your book just hit $5 million in sales! A very efficient secretary sits opposite you, laptop open. She scrolls through the calen- dar. “Okay, here’s your agenda for the next two weeks. You’re booked on Jimmy Fallon, Ellen, and Good Morning America. I’ve or- dered the limo and booked the suites you like. This time Carla and Juan will travel with you as assistants.” W AKING UP FROM THE DREAM Suddenly there is a god-awful noise. You force your eyes open and clear the remain- W RITERS ’ T RICKS OF THE T RADE ing cobwebs that come when waking from deep sleep. Your arm snakes over to shut off the alarm clock. No limos. No luxury suite. All you see is your own bedroom. You blink a few times, just to be sure. Nope. It was only that dream again—the one about basking in ce- lebrity author treatment. Sorry to say, your week will be a little different. Queues of people probably won’t ham- mer at your door begging for your appear- ance on their show or magazine spreads. That’s not because your work isn’t good, but rather because your appearance doesn’t mean their ratings or readership P AGE 28 S PRING 2019