— by Nicole Forgione
“Families need to have tough con-
versations and talk with elder profes-
sionals for guidance,” Lisa added.
“Make sure you are doing the best you
can for the elder’s safety. Try not to feel
guilty — you’re doing it out of love and
you hang on to that.”
Professional Services
Available
With so many types of senior living
facilities available, families may need
assistance to help assess their options.
There are professional services available
to lend support.
Helping Seniors & Their
Families Make Decisions
C
ouples who age together can
experience so many things
in life, from purchasing their
first house, having children and grand-
children, experiencing life’s special mo-
ments, coping with challenges and plan-
ning for retirement. Sometimes one of the
hardest things to anticipate is how one
feels when one half of that couple passes
away and those good celebrations and
bad times are treated differently without
a spouse or a significant other.
For Bobby, when he lost his wife
more than a decade ago, his memory loss
started to become a concern for loved
ones and his self-care took a downward
spiral. One of the toughest things for
him and his family was realizing that he
should not drive anymore. Throughout
the years, navigating stairs and cooking
for himself became a hazard. He needed
reminders to eat and to take a shower.
Even though there were concerns
by family members, Bobby thought he
was fine. He didn’t think it was neces-
sary to move. In the summer of 2017, his
daughter Lisa helped to make a very dif-
ficult decision. Bobby moved out of the
house that he cherished and to a local as-
sisted living facility. It was a move that
he thought was temporary, which initial-
34 WNY Family March 2019
ly may have helped with the transition.
When an older adult can help make
the decision to move from their home
to a different type of housing, it makes
things easier. Often times, family mem-
bers have to help with that decision-
making. Lisa, who resides in Kenmore,
NY, shared, “When someone has to help
make the decision for another person, it
can be very difficult and guilt-ridden.”
During this time of helping her dad
to better understand the move, one of Li-
sa’s main concerns was if he was going
to adjust well. “I wanted to make sure
there was a supportive environment. I
wanted to make sure concerns were be-
ing listened to and addressed. One of the
best things to help with the transition
was that dad was able to get a private
room due to private resources.”
As someone who has had this expe-
rience, Lisa suggested tips to help lend
others support who may be in similar
situations: “Look for ratios of staff and
safe guidelines, like how many people
and staff are on the unit.” She also ad-
vised to walk around and note smells
and safety precautions, like security at
the front desk. She suggested meeting
with the facility’s social work and ad-
ministrative staff to review concerns.
For example, one local company El-
derCare Solutions of WNY, has a scope
of services that can be as basic as doing
a one-time consultation for seniors and
their families to assist them in identify-
ing problems and finding solutions. Oth-
er services include home assessments,
along with referrals to community and
support services.
“We work with local and long-dis-
tance families whose elderly parents are
without support and who need a profes-
sional care manager to develop a safe
care plan,” said Roxanne Sorensen, L-
MHC, C-SWCM, CMC, GCM, SW-G,
aging life care specialist/owner, Elder-
Care Solutions of WNY. “Our oversight
and supervision bring clarity to unmet
needs. We understand the economy of
seniors in Western New York and pride
ourselves in providing affordable rates
for completion and representation of
Medicaid applications and other public
benefits. We work hand-in-hand with at-
torneys, financial advisors, physicians,
hospitals and other professionals to as-
sist them in maintaining their clients or
patients in a safe and affordable environ-
ment.”
Finding the Best Fit
Determining the most appropriate
levels of housing and care can be chal-
lenging for seniors themselves to under-
stand and for their family members to
conclude. Aging Life Care Specialists
are trained to assess the medical, finan-
cial, psych-social needs and safety of
people considering their needs — these