Wiregrass Seniors Magazine February 2019 FEBRUARY ISSUE | Page 11

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Page 11
People Who Disappoint Us
One of the most troubling of life’s experiences is to
run across those persons and occasions that disap-
point us. It is likely an inevitability to meet this un-
pleasant experience along the way. Being prepared
for it, dealing with it with grace and determining how
you will treat the person(s) involved afterward may
be considerations to contemplate.
Persons who disappoint us don’t necessarily
set out to do so. Their own insensitivity, their lack of
social graces, their inability at self discipline, may all
contribute to the occasion. The most sensitive way
to manage such moments is to respond with kind-
ness and gentleness. Sometimes that works and
sometimes it doesn’t. Returning kind with kind is no
way to face the person who has disappointed you.
Escalating the occasion will only exacerbate
the difficulty. Learning how to be graceful in situa-
tions in which there is none, is a sure fire way to
challenge others to reconsider their own behavior.
* Avoidance: while this may not always be practical,
it usually sends a strong signal.
* Straight Talk: when the disappointment occurs
communicate directly how/what has disappointed
you and help them understand why such behavior
is really uncalled for.
* Forgiveness: articulate that you and others
found a certain behavior disappointing and help
them understand that they are above such and
forgiveness brings the hope the behavior will not
be repeated.
* Pointing Out: reveal to the individual that a
behavior has been hurtful to others. Perhaps they
are or have been totally oblivious to the effect of
their words or actions.
* Modelling: Act out behaviors that demonstrate
appropriate behavior. Perhaps the point will be
made and received.
Of course, if disappointing behavior per-
sists, perhaps all that can be done is to cut off the
relationship with an explanation as to why. If the
person misses the point, then it is their loss and
you have done all you can do.
It is time to move forward with your life.