Willow Magazine CREATING LIFE - Page 66

I'm not certain of how to answer that.....

May I answer this way instead:

I learned

- That sometimes, for certain men, when faced with childbirth, they go into a "be useful" mode and might do or say something to communicate that while you are in active birthing, they think they are going to work, need to get food from the store or have to fumble with the light to make sure the lighting is perfect....

- A great midwife has mastered the art of holding space and being invisible. Our awesome midwife, Carly, was present but barely there, and I appreciated that. She could feel the shifts in the energy and only came into the room to check the baby's heart rate with a doppler. I didn't like the doppler and told her when it was enough - when to stop. I was in control. Sienna and I were in our flow. Jody - my husband - Sienna and I, we birthed each other.

- Sienna and I have been in communication for over a decade. I knew she was coming. My older daughter - Jordan - and I knew Sienna was coming. As I told Jordan when she was little, "Mommy has to wait for husband, papa, best friend, life partner to arrive, then Sienna can join us." Sienna and I were in communication during the birth. She was born into water. I knew when to push and said to her "I know this is challenging for you. It's intense for me too. Let's make this experience a memory. Let's meet each other, cuddle and nurse." She was out in three pushes.

- Sienna's birth was different in so many ways; I was and am in a loving partnership, I'm older (42!) and have more time and appreciation for the passing experience and moments of life. I feel supported.