Wanderlust: Expat Life & Style in Thailand Aug / Sept 2017: The Kids & Family Issue | Page 5

Editor's letter
E
xpectant mothers and fathers, long before their
children even sprout fingers and toes, latch onto
the idea that a squinty, helpless, and sometimes
cone-headed miniature human will soon spring into the
world and then into eager arms to become theirs. We are
having a baby, they say.
Are you ready? Everyone asks them, with what seems
to be a balanced blend of excitement and pity. Ready
as we can be, the future parents think, secretly wishing
there was some sort of litmus test to indicate baby-hav-
ing-readiness. Because it all seems a bit abstract as it is,
doesn’t it? So, with often only eight months or less to pre-
pare, the focus centers on accumulation. That’s what ev-
eryone else seems to do, after all.
Preparation to “have a baby,” a term that indicates
ownership, revolves around shopping for anticipated
items for imminent baby-proprietorship: adorable outfits
adorned with teddy bears and ducks, tiny nail scissors
with thoughtfully rounded edges, blue rubber bulbs for
noses, socks as small as finger puppets, burp clothes by
the truckload — anything they think this little houseguest
might need during his or her earliest days of a probable
two-decade stay.
But the wisest parents-to-be prepare for what is actu-
ally about to happen. They realize that expecting a child
isn’t just about painting the nursery walls the proper
shade of lavender nor is it about collecting a surplus of
pastel-patterned nappies. They realize that no one is “hav-
ing” a baby, but that two parents are about to be born. It’s
a process of becoming.
How can we ever prepare to become and then real-
ly be mothers and fathers? We stumble about in the dark,
learning as we go, sometimes with support but often
without it. And for those who raise children abroad, an al-
ready huge challenge gets an extra dollop of confusion:
Outside of familiar cultural norms, removed from support
networks, raising kids who won’t be sure which coun-
try to call home — these things complicate already very
complex matters.
Then, one day it happens. A little baby — with a button
nose, an oddly intoxicating scent, the smallest fingernails
in the world, and plump toes that look like they could de-
tach into flesh-colored pills — does indeed arrive.
But the baby is not the only arrival. It seems there are
not one but three houseguests now. Because, aside from
raccoon-eyes and spit-up stained shoulders, many new
parents can hardly recognize themselves. They wonder
why it was that no one told them they’d morph into coo-
ing, rocking, bouncing, humming, worried, teary-eyed —
and completely love-struck — versions of their previous
selves. Holding that warm bundle of new life in their arms,
it dawns: I am a new person, too.
In this “Kids and Family” issue, our goal is to provide
parents with some information and inspiration about fam-
ilies living a global lifestyle. Articles on kids’ education,
parenting third culture kids, and traveling with children
might be only enough to just scratch the surface, but we
hope that here you’ll find food for thought and maybe
some ideas for positive change or new ways forward.
When it comes down to it, no one really understands
exactly how to be the best mother or father, and perhaps
knowledge of how to parent third culture kids is espe-
cially sparse. But at least many of us are trying to learn
how — failing at times and succeeding at others, but al-
ways trying — each and every day.
Shannon
WWW.WANDERLUSTMAG.COMWANDERLUST 5