VISIBILITY Magazine Issue 02. (April 2017) - Page 37

to wait ‘til Derrick came so he could say goodbye. Overheard that it was time, none of my friends wanted to see me like this. I guess they’d wait ‘til the fu- neral. So there, with Momma, Sage, Derrick, the doc- tor and the nurse, I lay dead. I felt regret. I ruined Sage’s birthday. Her twen- ty-fifth birthday. I felt shame, that I died so young and so unaccomplished. Who would flip through my jour- nals? Who would tell each person how I really felt during that last argument? Who would tell the kids at EduAccess after-school that Ms. Morris wasn’t go- ing to come back? Who was going to tell me what I was doing, up here, on the ceiling? I felt my life get shredded in half before my eyes. Every eye in the room was wet with my potential. The fact I had such a bright future. How would Mom- ma pick up the pieces? How would my friends recover? Would my exes come to the funeral…? They covered me with a white sheet, just like they do on TV. Momma and Sage stayed there for what felt like a lifetime, Derrick’s arms around them. They murmured things about loving me. I followed them to the parking lot, the four of us walking side by side. . a n e c l A n o s --Alli 30