Unnamed Journal Volume 2, Issue 3 - Page 28

Catakuri - Taxation A Continued Discussion of the Causes and Natures of Feline Dominance By Fluffles, Translated by Tim Fibble D aily collection of taxes is a vital part of everyday governance. Taxes nourish the ruler, and nourishment is essential to life itself. One must establish an incontrovertible taxation schedule in the early days of one's reign. Though your subjects may have difficulty following your commands, do not accept excuses or delays from them: demand your taxes on time, every time. You appoint the hours, they supply the food. While the collection of taxes may seem a straightforward matter, many serfs have trouble determining the time of day with regularity. This is due to their inferior mental faculties. While their lot is truly piteous, one must always maintain a firm paw when it comes to tax collection. Therefore, it is best to begin circling your bowl, within the line of sight of the closest serf, up to an hour prior to the appointed collection time. This will allow the slow- witted serf time to grasp what is required of them. Sometimes a subject may be behind a closed portal when taxes are due. While this behavior is unacceptable, it is often simply due to ignorance or negligence. Simply wait outside the room and scratch at the door until it opens. Lecturing the serf(s) at volume through the portal is also an effective tactic. Of course, employing both techniques together leads to a higher rate of compliance. Once the door is open, lead the serf to the collection site and receive your taxes. A cautionary note: some subjects may become angered if you attempt to get their attention from behind a closed door. It's always best to appear completely incredulous at such displays before proceeding with haste to your receptacle. If a serf continues to behave aberrantly in response to your requests (which should not have to be made) simply begin filing a liquid or solid grievance every time a door is shut. Soon, you will condition your subject to keep all doors and portals open at all times. An open door grants you unfettered access to your subjects. Serfs will occasionally try to pass off inferior taxes. This travesty must be experienced to be fully comprehended. There are no hard and fast rules for identifying inferior taxes, but you will recognize them when they appear. Sadly, this delinquency can also be one of the harder behaviors to correct in serfs. The best way to communicate to a subject that they have proffered inferior tax is to refuse it. Communicate your refusal by staring in disbelief at your food, then in disbelief at your subject. Continue alternating your incredulous gaze until your subject realizes their error and replaces the meal with the correct repast. If your serf will not replace their inferior taxes with adequate ones, simply walk away from your receptacle. Do not file a grievance, but let your displeasure be known: sulking, pouting, and refusing tribute are good ways to communicate your discontent.