A husband and wife who worked for the circus went to an adoption agency .
Social workers there raised doubts about their suitability .
The couple produced photos of their 50-foot motor home , which was clean , well maintained and equipped with a beautiful bedroom for the child .
The social workers raised concerns about the education a child would receive while in the couple ’ s care .
“ We ’ ve arranged for a full-time tutor who will teach the child all the usual subjects along with French , Mandarin and computer skills .”
The social workers expressed concern about a child being raised in a circus environment .
“ Our nanny is a certified expert in pediatric care , welfare , and diet . In addition , there are 17 other children who travel with their circus parents .”
The social workers were finally satisfied . They asked , “ What age child are you hoping to adopt ?”
“ It doesn ’ t really matter , as long as the kid fits into the cannon . ---------------------------------------------------------------
The WalSmart Manager liked hiring Vets , put he had a particular problem with the oldest Vet he had ever hired and assigned as a door greeter . The old guy ( as the Manager came to refer to him as ) was beyond reproach at customer service , could tell all the customers where everything in the store was located , every customer gave the Old Guy the highest score possible on every survey ,
However , the old guy was 15 minutes late every morning .
As he had hired many Veterans the Manager knew he would need to counsel the old guy . He called him back into the Manager ’ s Office and discussed the problem with him . He knew the old guy had done at least 30 years in the Navy and this 15 minutes late every day stuff wouldn ’ t be tolerated no matter how good the old guy performed his duties . After the old guy explained that the 15 minutes in the morning was a work in progress , the Manager wanted to know what it was that the Navy people would say to him if he was 15 minutes late ?
The old guy deliberated over the WalSmart Manager ’ s direct question , pondered his measured response , then spoke softly . ...........
Usually if I was delayed 15 minutes in the mourning the Navy people I meet would ask ; “ Would you like coffee Admiral ? “ --------------------------------------------------------------- A guy is at work one day when his buddy notices he is wearing an earring . The man walks up to him and says , “ I didn ’ t know you were into earrings .”
“ Don ’ t make such a big deal , it ’ s only an earring ,” he growls back . “ So how long have you been wearing one ?”
“ Ever since my wife found it in my truck .”