THRIVING Melanin Family Magazine November 2018 | Page 57

Try to plan everything ahead Make sure that all transitions schedules and travel arrangements are set in place ahead of time. Do not leave everything for the last minute. Schedule time to use video chat if possible. Also consider sending each other pictures so either parent won’t totally miss things out like pictures with Santa. Set reasonable expectations and release control Do not feel guilty that your children Holliday will be “different”. This is the perfect opportunity to create new seasonal traditions that will bring you joy. Release control by not  worrying about what’s happening on the other household.  Plan Gifts Help your child create or pick gifts for the other parent. Kindness goes long ways, even if not reciprocated. The lesson is on what your children see and learns. Parents, please... Do NOT try to Out- Do each other. Children are smart and you don’t want to open that can of worms. That can lead to them feeling entitled and smart enough to manipulate both of you. Try to coordinate with your CoParent to agree to set a limits for gifts and money. Also discuss what would be off limits because of age or each household values. Other family members can be included.  Do Not try to Control the other household If you are scared that your children get out of hand and come back with different habits or feel anxious about going to another environment.  Set some alone time with your children and talk about expectations while preparing him for new people or experiences. Loosen up some of your household r NOVEMBER 2018 • THRIVE | 55