THRIVING Melanin Family Magazine May 2017: A Mother's Love | Page 20

Well we all had tears rolling down our faces, I
assumed they were from laughing. I could only
imagine what was going through the minds of
everyone walking by us. I am sure we looked
like absolutely horrible people that needed to be
reported to someone or anyone.
Strength
My mom’s strength is what I envied the most.
No matter what was thrown at her, she had the
strength to overcome it. Losing her husband,
raising us kids on her own, and fighting an
excruciating battle with cancer. It was her strength
and determination that kept us all going. It was
a long and horrific battle at times. Many times,
we thought we were going to lose her, but she
pushed through it because she wasn’t ready to go.
After one of her extended stays in the ICU, we
finally got to take her home in a wheelchair. My
sister in law and I decided it would be a great
idea to take her on a trip to Pennsylvania. We
figured as kind of a last hurrah to say goodbye
to her brothers and one of her dearest friends
because we really didn’t think she would recover.
During our second bathroom break in the first
half hour of our trip we began to question our
decision and seriously thought about turning
around. There was absolutely No Way she was
letting us do that. About the third or fourth stop
we were still “trying” to get the hang of the in
and out of the car. We kind of got a little excited
trying to figure it out and she sort of went flying
across the back seat of the truck.
As my mom was lying there floundering aimlessly
across the back seat, like a new surfer paddling
to catch her first wave, we realized that our
system of you pull I push was seriously flawed.
I would like to say that we held our composure,
but none of us could stop laughing hysterically.
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Once we finally pulled ourselves together we got
that “Only You Girls” look that she always gave
us when she was trying to act annoyed with us,
but really wanted to laugh. We did eventually get
her sat back up and situated so we could keep
going. I know what you all must be thinking, but
in my defense, we called it even for her leaving
me at a gas station in Florida. (That is a story of
its own).
She was also a huge supporter of the Central
New York Ronald McDonald House for the
holidays. They were dear to her heart after all
the time my sister spent there to be near my
nephew. Every year we always had to watch the
Jerry Lewis Marathon so she could donate, no
matter how much we kids complained.
the holidays and give them a gift for Christmas.
My mom, even when she couldn’t work and was
sick, was the first one to help. We gave away 10
gifts that year to single moms. This past year
was our 5th year and we adopted 100 moms
between local moms, moms in the Ronald
McDonald House, Upstate Golisano Children’s
Hospital, and some women’s shelters.
This is why I began my Adopt-A-Mom for Christmas
Program when she was so sick. She had always
done so much for the holidays for others and in
2011 she was so sick and our family was pretty
down. Her favorite holiday wasn’t feeling much
like the happy holidays for any of us. There are no words that can be said to really
express how much I miss this woman. But I do
know that she has been chuckling at us lately
with her, “Only You Girls” expression. I can hear
her saying it regularly.
With the help of others, I decided to pick some
local moms that needed a little pick me up for I love you and I miss you every day. Until we
meet again.
That was our last stop of the trip down, which
turned out to be the best thing we could have
done for her. I am not sure if it was her pure
determination or because she feared for her
life, but I am happy to say that we brought her
home from Pennsylvania walking like she hadn’t
in months.
Caring and Compassion
She was one of the most caring and
compassionate women that anyone would ever
meet. She would have given the shirt off her
back if it was the last thing that she owned. As
a kid, I remember going shopping with her to
buy Christmas presents for families that couldn’t
afford anything. The local Marine Corp Toys for
Tots chairman always told her he could count on
her to donate her pillows and other gifts to the
program.
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