The Well Magazine Fall/Winter 2013 - Page 15

Dear Daughter... The following is an excerpt from a Chicago Sun-Times column which was published on December 5, 2013. To read the entire column, go to www.suntimes.com. T hese are a few lessons on life written to my daughter. Some of them are rooted in the wisdom of my dearly departed grandmother. Some rinsed with humor. Some stem from my own experience — and even my mistakes — as a man. All are shared in hope and concern. And perhaps in them lie lessons for all daughters: Dear daughter, don’t embrace the privilege of being my daughter but reject the responsibility of being my daughter. I Coming Soon A collection of columns by award-winning Chicago Sun-Times columnist John W. Fountain. Winner of the Chicago Journalists’ Association and Illinois Associated Press Editors Awards in 2012 for best commentary. Fountain’s columns provide a fresh perspective on the times we live in. “His writing is crisp and compelling as he tackles issues head-on, giving his readers a look into his thoughts and feelings.”—Judges of the Chicago Journalists Association Awards love you no less when I am giving you words of wisdom and lessons that you find difficult than when I am giving you good gifts. You need both for your journey into — and throughout — womanhood. Dear daughter, some women say, “All men are dogs!” If this is true, then some of them must confess to being dogcatchers, dog keepers, dog lovers and to having laid down with dogs. I see not a dog in your future but a man. A BD (a baby daddy) too often becomes just a DB (a deadbeat). Choose instead an HF (husband/father) who will help you build an FH (family/home). Don’t settle for a “fixer-upper,” thinking you can “change” him. It’s easier to flip a house than to flip a man — and a lot more profitable with a lot less heartache. Don’t date a THUG — a Trifling Harmful Undependable Guy: If his mother didn’t raise him, you certainly can’t. So if the raising’s not done, you’re stuck with someone else’s unfinished son. If you begin making excuses for a man, rest assured you’ll have to keep making excuses for him. You can do good all by yourself…. John W. Fountain is the founder and president of WestSide Press Books, a professor of journalism at Roosevelt University in Chicago and an awardwinning columnist for the Chicago SunTimes. Fall/Winter 2013 The Well Magazine 15