The Perfect Gentleman Issue 1 - March 2016 | Page 23

Mannered Gentleman
When do you send a Thank You note?

What should be said in a note?

Every time that you receive a present, attend a
special event you were invited to (birthday,
wedding, anniversary etc.), stay at someone's
house, or have received special help with a
project, or planning an event or party, or at a
time of bereavement. As a parent, it is also
your responsibility to write any such notes on
behalf of your children whilst they are still
unable to do so for themselves, and to
encourage and assist them to write the notes
themselves as soon as they are able to write
their own.

At the most fundamental level, a Thank You
note is for saying thank you. If you have
received a present that you are not very happy
with, or you think is not appropriate, then any
snide or passive aggressive comments or
sentiments should be kept to yourself, and not
expressed in any way in the Thank You note.

The Thank You note should be sent out as
soon as possible in most circumstances (i.e.
within the same week) although for weddings,
it is acceptable to allow some extra time (no
more than three months) as this is generally a
time where there are a number of other things
going on, like that long awaited honeymoon.

A traditional Thank You note has a standard
format. It opens and closes with expressions of
gratitude. Make sure that you are not overly
flowery with your wording here, as a genuine
heartfelt thank you is always more authentic,
and expresses your thanks more sincerely. In
between these opening and closing thanks, you
should mention the present that you have
received, and make some comment about how
well it has been received. You should also add a
nod towards the future before your final
expression of thanks.

There is an example of a traditional thank you note
for receiving a present below:
Dear Juliette,
Thank you so much for your present. The cake tin was exactly what was missing from our kitchen,
and we have already made a delicious sponge. We can't wait to make something for you the next
time you come round. Once again, many thanks.
Love,
Sophie
For someone's help over a special period, an example
might be:
Dear Tom,
Thank you for all the help that you gave me in organising Dad's birthday. He really enjoyed
himself, and was completely surprised. I truly valued the advice that you gave me, and couldn't
have done it without your calm reassurance. I really can't thank you enough.
Lots of love,
Georgia

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