He left me pregnant
and full of debts
I remember my childhood clearly. I
can recall the beatings, the abuse, the
abandonment and the unhappiness.
My mother would beat me for any
and every reason until my body
was covered in bruises. What hurt
the most was the hatred I saw in
her eyes. I couldn’t understand
why she despised me so much.
feeling so much anger that the thoughts
of killing my daughter and taking my
own life would immediately follow.
Eventually, I met the man who today
is my husband, but it wasn’t long
after, that the arguments started.
The attacks at night and the anger
at my daughter, led my husband and
I to search for help amongst those
involved in black magic. But nothing
was resolved, and things only got worse.
When a friend of mine invited me to the
UCKG, I refused, so my husband went
in my place. I had my misconceptions
and would never set foot in that place!
I ran away from home when I was
just 14 to be with my boyfriend at the
time. Our four-year relationship was a
period of time that I describe only as
‘hell.’ He left me with nothing but debts
when he found out I was pregnant.
Refusing to go back home, I stayed
alone and struggled desperately
with thoughts of killing my baby girl.
At night I began to have sexual attacks.
It was truly frightening. I would wake up
Yet I found myself exactly where I
didn’t want to be. It was a Wednesday
meeting, and I just wanted to see if
the God they were talking about could
really help me. I spoke to an adviser, and
by the time our conversation was over,
the difference I felt was unmistakable.
I felt peace for the first time in such a
long while, and I decided that things
weren’t going to be the same again.
I kept attending with my family. I had
become revolted at all that was wrong
with me. I needed to change. I made a
vow with God. He either had to change
my personality or kill me because I
couldn’t accept who I was anymore.
10 LOCAL NEWS | UCKG.ORG | 020 7686 6000
I am astonished with the changes that
started happening in me. As I continued
attending the UCKG, the thoughts of
killing my daughter and the sexual
attacks at night gradually disappeared.
I couldn’t
accept
who I was
anymore.”
Hope, joy and tranquility have taken
the place of the anger and torment
that was inside me. It’s as if God
washed me clean. I am now a loving
mother and a dedicated wife, who
is happily married. I can only thank
God for erasing all the pain and
hurt from the past, and for giving
me the chance to be a new woman
and a better mother to my children.
Vanilda da Silva
Stop families
from reaching
extinction!
Do you give your spouse your undivided
attention? Are you constantly irritated by
your siblings? Do you always lose your
patience with your children?
Have you ever stopped to think
why you treat strangers better than
you treat your own family? And no,
‘they’re my family, I can be how
I want with them’, is not a good
excuse for your bad behaviour
towards them.
The people you supposedly love
deserve to receive the best version
of you.
When a member of your family is
talking to you, do you listen with
intent to understand or do you
simply listen to reply? Do you
find that, when a member of your
family is telling you something that
you are interested in, that you care
about what they are telling you, or
are you, in actual fact, just planning
your response instead?
Are you mindful and appreciative
of the members of your family?
Do you see their strengths? Do
you tell them how grateful you are
for them? Or, do you only speak
up when something about them
bothers you?
We unintentionally create negative
relationships with our family by not
paying attention to our actions and
words when we interact with them.