By Darryl Litteton
One big ATM.
Maybe a manager on a screen
whose held up in a bullet proof back room or in the
basement, but no tellers needing coffee breaks
and insurance.
Let’s face it – there’s jobs you don’t need to train for
anymore because they will soon be gone. They
raised the minimum rate because there’s not going to
be any minimum wage gigs. Fast food would be
done faster by a machine, not a kid with a cell phone
and adolescent issues.
So most jobs in the near
future will be done by computers and robots and if
you’re reading this you’re probably neither by birth.
It doesn’t matter who the next president is going to
be if you’re a coal miner the future looks black and
not the good kind.
Now don’t panic, it won’t
happen tomorrow, but all you unskilled workers out
there better recognize. You need a skill. Some of
you think you have skills – street skills, but just because
you’re from the streets or live on them doesn’t mean
you’ve learned anything.
Think you’re a dope dealer? Think again. The Bush
Family are dope dealers. See, if I’m coming to your
crib or we’re meeting up in a parking lot – you have
no skills as a dealer. Check selling booty off your list
of street skills as well. Everybody on the streets has a
booty; some tight, some loose, some flat, some
sculptured. One thing though - if you can be bought
for pocket cash from somebody with a hole in their
pocket – you’ve got unskilled booty. Now let’s not
forget stealing. Stealing is not a skill. I stole liquor as
a kid.
Doesn’t make me a thief.
Makes me an
alcoholic. If you’re not on a keyboard moving vast
sums of currency from one account to another – you
have no skills in modern day theft.
Okay, how about jobs you can find in the want ads?
If you’re going through your manual on how to be a
bank teller – put that mess down. Ain’t gonna be no
bank tellers in the future. Bank tellers get scared and
give up the money. They work from the inside to rob
the joint. Naw, it’s all going to be a computer.
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Give up on thinking you’re going to be a top meter
maid. Meter maids can be intimidated or flirted
with. They’ll have robot doing that job. A robot
doesn’t care about front row tickets to the local
Pop Warner football game or getting its freak on.
A robot won’t stop writing the ticket because
you’re cute or have a pathetically heartbreaking
story. And unlike a meter maid if you talk trash to a
robot it will taze you.