Synaesthesia Magazine Hush-Hush | Page 57

‘The other day I received a comment from someone telling me they think I have improved so much since they first started following me. That’s the beauty of the online community. I can work from home, share my works, and get feedback on them. I think their encouragement is also one of the reasons I wanted to pursue art full time.’ I got in contact with Xiaofan late last year. Seeing her popularity, I wasn’t sure if she would be willing to contribute to Synaesthesia, especially as the magazine doesn’t make any money, so our gratitude (for now) lacks financial support. But our network of artists is entirely based on the generosity of those who love the arts, so I prayed Xiaofan thought the same. Xiaofan is known as Untamed Little Wolf online. Her work ranges from fluid, more impressionist scenes of dreamy countryside and the night sky, to more detailed pieces of animals or people and recently, even stamp-work. I first discovered her for her ethereal whale painting, which sees a whale bathed in gorgeous underwater light (top right); it captivated me. But it hasn’t always been simple for Xiaofan. An inkling of doubt Xiaofan spent her childhood growing up in China; she was studious, clever, and dedicated to her studies. She excelled in her maths and physics exams, and afterwards, gained admission to major in statistics in China. She was also offered to study engineering in Singapore – and so she grabbed the opportunity with both hands, and her journey began. Or so she thought. Imagine keeping a secret from your family, friends, even yourself. For a 17-year-old who had never left the country before, Xiaofan’s move from China to Singapore to pursue a career in engineering was a colossal commitment, and one that she believed was the sensible choice. However, it wasn’t easy, and not just because she was leaving her family to make an immense move – geographically and emotionally. But she thought she was doing the right thing. Her secret wasn’t as clear to her as I thought it would be. Everyone told her she was making the right choice – her parents, family and friends – but something still didn’t quite feel right. Something was missing. She continues: ‘I don’t know if you’ve ever known that you’re good at something, but you also know that you have no passion for it, at all? That’s me with engineering – I didn’t even need to make an effort. I was good at studying, good at my job, and everyone said that it was a >> “ Imagine keeping a secret from your family, friends, even yourself