SPLICED Magazine Issue 01 Oct/Nov 2013 | Page 109

Lost Boys Eish. The 80’s. At the time, Lost Boys was a sexy, slick modernization of the vampire genre. A zeitgeist. Thing is, shoulderpads were also really hot at the time. As was Cory Haim. Neither aged well either. Now it’s hilarious, but painful to watch beneath a truckload of feathered hair, torn jeans, kak “CGI” and Keifer Sutherland going ‘Rawr!’ in an over-extended Wham video. in the Machine The Awakening Rebecca Hall (of Vicky Christina Barcelona) is a Victorian Ghostbuster, exploring the scientific basis of paranormal phenomena and expos ing hoaxes created for financial gain from grieving survivors. Then a teacher from an all-boys academy hires her to investigate the recent death of a student attributed to the ghost of an old student. It’s stylish, if somewhat slow. Shutter Again, avoid the 2008 American remake starring Joshua Jackson that racked up a whopping 7% on Rotten Tomatoes. The Thai original has much more to it. After a drunken hit-and-run, Tun and Jane leave the mangled body of a pedestrian lying in the road. Tun, a photographer, starts to notice ghostly shadows in his photographs. Then Jane discovers that the pedestrian may not have been that random at all, and Tun, may in fact deserve to be haunted for his actions. The Woman In Black Harry Potter gets embroiled in mysterious child suicides in a turn-ofthe-century country town. The Sixth Sense Perhaps the only good movie M. Night Shyamalan has made. Sure, thousands of T-shirts have been made sporting the phrase ‘I See Dead People’ and the surprise twist is now a cliché; but still worth a watch. Paranormal Activity Taking the stylistic ‘found footage’ standard of The Blair Witch Project, Paranormal Activity plays on the ultimate childhood paranoia of things that go bump in the night. And it works. The Happening SPOILER ALERT: Nothing happens. They’re running away from a light breeze They Were Horrors Titanic A boat gets attacked by an iceberg. Thousands die. There are violins. And Celine Dion bores into your brain forever. It’s brutal. Wolfman SPOILER ALERT: It should’ve been great. But it’s not. It’s bloody awful. Rather watch the 1941 schlock classic. The Others Blue Valentine Sometimes chainsaws are more delicate than marriage. Nicole Kidman spends 101 minutes of your life checking to see if the doors are locked whilst trying to move her face. SPOILER ALERT: She doesn’t succeed in doing either. Enid The Village Much like IT – take something you loved as a kid (Enid Blyton) and show it up for what it really is. She was a horrible person. Like, Roald Dahl character horrible. SPOILER ALERT: They’re just Mormons. Requiem For A Dream It’s a great movie. But the kind that will haunt you indefinitely. It’s the paralleled demise of a mother and son through addiction; his through heroin, hers through prescription diet pills. At once really sexy, but ultimately deeply disturbing, Requiem has always been on my list as an example of truly great filmmaking. On numerous levels – the experience of drug-taking, the intimacy of a couple just lying in bed together, the overwhelming paranoia of the mental breakdown of a lonely middle aged woman. Chronicle Sure, give the social outcast superpowers; great idea. feature / movies / movie list of horror! 109