Katherine Slee, mum to Dylan and Scarlett, shares her experience of how returning to work can turn out to be something altogether different.
A New Chapter
Parenthood
I used to work as an investment banker. But my husband and I agreed that we didn’t want our future children to only see their parents at weekends, the intervening hours spent with a nanny or at nursery. Of course, we were in the fortunate position where we had the choice. Many families don’t have that luxury, with both parents needing to work in order to stay afloat financially.
It wasn’t easy. My husband would leave the house before the children woke and rarely got home before they were in bed. He also travels a lot and so I would find myself alone for the majority of my waking life. This is where the NCT proved invaluable. My weekly coffee mornings with other women going through the same life-changing experiences were invaluable. Their provision of comfort, support and endless cups of tea helped get me through the loneliest moments.
Then my children were no longer babies. As they grew tall enough to be clothed in uniforms instead of babygros a new experience beckoned. I had time. Six whole hours every day when I didn’t have to be a mum. I could be me.
What to do with all those extra minutes? I couldn’t return to my old job even if I wanted to. The industry had moved on and besides, I had no desire to face the daily commute and office politics. Then there was the never-ending cycle of washing, cleaning and cooking. The need to be around when the children came home from school, to read them bedtime stories and navigate the murky waters of PTA meetings, sports days and summer fairs. But I wanted more.
So I wrote. Books and stories have been my passion for as long as I can remember - I wrote my first book when I was 12 years old and have filled countless notebooks with ideas and stories ever since. My first attempt was rejected by every single agent I sent it to, but the limited feedback I got told me that the writing was good, that I should try again. So I did. That one was rejected too and whilst I knew I was doing something wrong, I just didn’t have a clue what that was.
I stumbled across an article about a writing course run by the Professional Writing Academy. It was online, which meant I could fit it in around the children, and only four weeks, so I figured that if I didn’t like it or find it worthwhile then it wouldn’t be too much time wasted. On that course not only did I discover the lead character of my next book, but also a trusted friend and a wonderful tutor who have encouraged me every step of the way. I went on to do another online course with Faber Academy, which resulted in my debut novel that was released at the end of March.
Having children changes everything, not least your desire as a parent to give them the world. I want both my children to believe that anything is possible, as long as they’re willing to work hard and never give up. To them I am now not only a mother, but also, I hope, inspiration for them to pursue whatever it is that they want most of all.
It has always been my dream to be a writer, but I never dared take the plunge, to believe that it could be a reality, until my children showed me that life doesn’t always turn out the way you expect it to. So follow your heart. There is more than one way.
“The Girl in the Shadows,” by Katherine Debona, is available on Amazon.