Back When
by Kody Whittum
I was born in 1945. It wasn’t the best time to be born in the U.S., as World War II had just ended. I wasn’t lucky enough to be born into a rich or powerful family, not even a family that had money to spare after bills and groceries. No, I was born into a family that had no money to spare and we had to stretch every check and every dollar we had even down to the cent. Of course, this was back when the dollar had a lot less value than it does now. I had five older siblings, me being the youngest. So I obviously didn’t get everything a baby should. I was born in Manchester, New Hampshire. My family was French and I learned French growing up. My family wasn’t very easy going; since we were always stressing about money everyone had a short fuse. My father wasn’t the nicest man when I was growing up. His way of parenting was since there’s a bunch of kids they should all be able to help each other stay out of trouble and they should stop each other from doing anything stupid. So when one did something stupid or got themselves in trouble we all got punished. And it wasn’t a quick ten minute time out. He used to take a thick, real leather belt and hit all of us with it. He would make sure we felt it.
Going through school wasn’t bad but when I got to sixth grade my family needed some extra income so I dropped out of school and went to work at the factory. Every week I brought home about a $1.50 and my father took the whole thing every time I worked there for a while until I was old enough to work at the bakery down the street from my house.
In 1961, when I was about 16 years old I met my future husband as well as my first boyfriend. I met him while I was on my way home from work because my parents needed stuff from the deli across the street from where I worked. When I walked in I saw a handsome man that looked a little older than me. I got my things and moved on with my day. The next couple of months I would go in there just to see him without even talking to him until one day he asked me why I kept coming in there. I just froze up and couldn’t say anything. He then offered to go out to a movie.
This was in a time where people dated others for a reason. Back when the point of dating was to find the one you were going to marry. People didn’t throw themselves into relationships right away; back then people took things slow and were friends before they dated. And when two people liked each other they would go out on dates together. People were actually romantic back then and I remember the first time he came to pick me up in his convertible sports car, I saw him through my window and immediately ran downstairs. I stood in front of the door trying to compose myself before I went out. I made sure my hair was okay even though I had already spent at least an hour trying to make my hair look good. I walked out and my face got red as soon as I looked at him. I walked over and got in the car. He brought us to the drive-in on the other side of town. We just sat in the car talking the whole movie getting to know each other. I could hardly listen to him because I just kept staring into his charming eyes.
The way we could just hold a conversation for so long, and the way he made me so comfortable. It was the happiest I’ve ever been. I remember the sunset that night. It was a beautiful purple skyline behind the hills. I knew he would be the one for me.
We got married in 1964. It was the happiest time of my life. We had our first kid in 1970, our second in 1972, the third in 1973, and our last in 1974. All but one live in Manchester still and the last one lives with me to take care of me with her husband and her three kids.
In 2002 my husband died of a heart attack. It left me devastated and hurt. I keep his ashes in an urn on my bureau. Every time I look at his urn it takes me to the times back when things were a lot more simple. When everyone wanted to love and be friends with everyone. Nowadays kids are all on drugs. They don’t know what real fun is like anymore. Everything is given to kids now. When I was younger we had to work for the things we had. I miss the old times when people went to each others' house to hang out every weekend, and when people went to the movies. Everything is on the internet now. Back when I was young we had to actually see someone in person to talk to them. I want to go back to the good old times.
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