Wellbeing
Getting to know yourself
By the time you are reading this your New Year ’ s resolutions will lie in tatters . Why bother even trying . We are bound to fail . Doesn ’ t have to be so , but it usually is , because we go about it the wrong way . We start out resolute and strong . Gradually we weaken and before we know it we are back , knee deep in that which we resolved to put behind us . So what ’ s the secret for success in whatever sphere you really , really want to achieve in ? You won ’ t become a high jump champion if you are 5 feet 2 inches high . You won ’ t become an opera singer if you haven ’ t a note in your head , and you most certainly won ’ t win a beauty contest if you look remotely like me . So be practical and get to know what you need , what will really , really make you happy and at peace with yourself and with the world around you . If you look at your recently smashed resolutions , you will see that your greater happiness or the happiness of those around you , were their main focus . If not , were you aiming in the wrong direction ? The only way to know if we are making the correct choices is firstly to KNOW YOURSELF . How many times have we heard that ?
Knowing your height , weight , where you were born your profession , etc . are relevant to knowing yourself but only superficially . “ Knowing thyself ” as intimated by the Greek aphorism inscribed in the forecourt of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi was asking for a much deeper search appraisal . Know they inner self , know what makes you tick . Know your deepest secrets which maybe you didn ’ t even know yourself . We are vastly complicated , Let ’ s make no bones about it , getting to know yourself is not going to be easy . Benjamin Franklin observed the great difficulty in knowing myself with “ There are three things extremely hard , steel , a diamond and to know one ’ s self .
If its going to be all that difficult you might well ask , is it really worth the hassle ?
Let ’ s have a look at how important it really is and then you can make up your own mind whether or not it is a worthwhile pursuit . These are just some of the opinions of some accredited writers and philosopher ’ s :
Aristotle once said , “ Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom .” “ He who knows others is wise , he who knows himself is enlightened .” “ The closer you come to know that you alone create the world of your experience the more vital it becomes for you to discover just who is doing the creating .” ( Please read that last one at least twice .) “ The better you know yourself , the better your relationship with the rest of the world .” “ The whole ‘ Know thyself ’ thing isn ’ t a journey to a fixed destination . Knowing about myself changes me , forcing me to learn more . “ Know thyself ” isn ’ t a goal . It ’ s a road .
And in conclusion ... The benefits of self-knowledge according to Meg Selig is happiness , less inner conflict , better decision-making , and selfcontrol . Also resistance to social pressure , tolerance and understanding , vitality and pleasure . The payoff may indeed be worth the hassle . Now the magic bullet . Well there is one and that ’ s meditation and mindfulness which I will go into in more detail in next month ’ s edition of Soltalk . For now I would like to set you an exercise in self-knowledge . It ’ s really a form of meditation because you have to be aware . That ’ s what meditation is all about . Becoming aware .
The next time you criticize or are judgmental about anyone , ( including yourself ,) anything , or any action , become aware that you are criticising . Verbalize it . Say inwardly “ I am judging .” Then ask yourself why . Why am I ? Does it make me feel important ? Is it effective in bringing about worthwhile change ? Get to know and dig out the reason why you judged that particular action or person . Now every time you criticize or judge find out why . Become aware of your reasons .
In doing this relatively simple exercise you will be amazed how much you will learn about yourself . A first step in the pursuit of self-knowledge and a growing in awareness . Love to hear what you have learned . Go easy on yourself .
Nerja Meditation Group meets every Wednesday from 12 noon to 2pm . The venue is Esencia , c / Los Huertos 74B , Nerja . For further information email herondo @ gmail . com
Tony Downey M . Ed ., Dip Spec . Ed . DASE .
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