So Much Water Volume 1 Issue 3 Summer 2015 - Page 10

Off The Water

The Road Trip

Can be a very different trip for a lot of people. It can mean pushing the family into the Ford station wagon and driving all night to a beach condo in Florida or just driving around on the back roads with a buddy, usually involving a cold adult beverage, I've heard of people doing that anyway.

The destination is the least important factor in a good road trip It’s how you get there. I once made a trip to New Orleans for Mardi Gras in a Chevy Chevette hatch back with a buddy of mine. We both wore jet fighter pilot helmets for most of the trip and needless to say we had as much fun getting there as we did being there. Despite that Louisiana State Troopers assume that anyone wearing jet fighter pilot helmets while driving must be abusing controlled substances. But as it turns out there is no law in Louisiana that says you can’t wear a JFPH while driving and we were released with a warning that we should remove the JFPH to avoid suppression of illegal activity or intent. Who knew crooks were trying to draw attention to themselves, we didn’t!

While a successful road trip doesn’t require JFPH, there are specific needs and roles, yes roles not rules, to be maintained. Any trip over four hours requires a navigator. No navigator, well you’re just driving to someplace. GPS, Garmin or TomTom does not count. While these devices may be used, a Navigator in the passenger seat is still required. Snacks are stored behind the driver’s seat, unless there is a third person, the snack captain, on the trip. The job of the snack captain is to monitor and distribute snacks and beverages as requested by the driver or the navigator. The snack captain’s position is the middle back seat leaning forward so snack request can be easily heard over the blaring Steppenwolf CD. If there is no snack captain on the trip the duties fall to the navigator.

For a true road trip, there must be gear and lots of it. In a trailer, roof topper and if your driving a truck or SUV the back should be packed tighter than a nun at Sunday morning mass. The type of gear depends on the trip. Needless to say, but I will anyway, a family trip to Disneyland is not the gear for a four day back country camp floating and fishing. If the trip involves multi genders, the amount of gear will take care of itself as accessories count as gear on a multi gender trip.

Lastly, a good trip should involve road side attractions, the more the better. But before you go and blow a gasket, that does not mean you have to stop at any of them. Just knowing of their existence, seeing the location and yes, direction signs also count. The navigator should be making these on the map for later reference because the road trip isn’t about the destination, it’s how you get there and those road side attractions will spark campfire conversation for years.

“Remember that time we drove to Mardi Gras wearing JFPH and drove right pass the world’s largest crawdad?” “Was that before or after you hit that cow?”

“Just after, that was one awesome trip, wasn’t it!”

“Then that hitch hiker we picked up said…..”

Fair WInds and Following Seas!

The Editor