Small Business Today Magazine JUN 2014 MASTERWORD SERVICES INC | Page 32

EDITORIALFEATURE

Gaining by Giving
By Donna Rooney

E

ven after all these years, I can still remember my mom saying, “It’s always
better to give than to receive.” In
my youth, this was a concept that I
struggled to understand but as I grew wiser with age, I learned to embrace it. This
expression is now summarized by many
in the networking world as “Givers Gain”
which was coined by Ivan Misner, founder
of BNI. 

Simply put, “Givers Gain” is a philosophy based on the law of reciprocity. In the
context of networking, people who adopt
this philosophy dedicate themselves to
providing leads to others rather than making business for themselves their primary
concern. The hope is that others treated in
such a manner will naturally become eager
to repay such kindness through reciprocation by providing business leads in return.
Repaying kindness with kindness is a very
basic human response which in turn fosters the spread of additional good deeds.

Networking is something that most
people do every day without even being
aware of it. Sure, some are better at it than
others; but as social animals, humans are
natural networkers. Still, effective networking is a skill that must be learned and practiced. Really successful networkers never
stop sharpening their skills but for some,
networking can seem a daunting experience. Networking isn’t only for people
with “Type A” personalities either. 

Here are a few simple truths that
everyone should keep in mind:

 Always remember that people are just
people who are filled with many of the
same wants, desires, hopes, and fears. No
matter what position a person holds in the
business world, they all put their pants on

one leg at a time just like you do.  If you
can’t work past your fear of rejection and
reach out to strangers, you will quite possibly miss making a friend or possibly a great
business deal.

Remember that when you attend networking events or are just networking in
general, do not approach it as a sales call.
Remember when you began to date, how
difficult it was to not be too anxious on
that first date? The same is true with networking. If you appear too eager, this can
be seen by others as being shallow and
make you seem more interested in a quick
sale rather than a long term business relationship. Apply this principle to your networking skills. Networking should be taken
in the long view and it needs to be engaged in slowly in order to create trust and
credibility. So it’s best to not try to close
deals after the initial meeting.

Use your time intelligently by focusing
on your core business prospects. Unless you just enjoy attending networking
events, pare these down to those that will
offer the best quality and number of individuals in businesses that will expand your
customer-base.

Request more business cards than you
give out. Provide your card if someone
requests it, but when you request someone else’s card, you’ve just placed yourself
in control of the follow-up. Once you’ve
determined whose cards represent those
you need to follow up with, do so immediately while the memory of who you are
is fresh in your prospect’s mind. Send follow-up communications right away, even
if it’s just a short note reminding the person about your conversation.You’ll make a
positive impression and perhaps a business

30 SMALL BUSINESS TODAY MAGAZINE [ JUNE 2014 ]

contact or client as a result. At worst, it’ll
widen your base of contacts which may
prove to be useful later.

As with anything else, a little introspection is good for us all. Being fully aware of
your own strengths and weaknesses is important to success in networking. Each of
us falls at a different place along the personality spectrum. So being honest with
your self, which is always the best policy,
allows you to more carefully plan what
personal traits need to be accepted or improved upon if necessary. 

People who do incredibly well aren’t just
trying to sell the service or the product;
they offer service and value.That is a giving
mentality and it works. We all want to help
our friends and help people who are kind
and generous. When we are focused on
other people, our own problems are minimized. In general, people who give more
tend to be happier.

In closing, I’d like to share a story I’d read
some time back that has a direct bearing
on what I have shared: On his deathbed,
an elderly gentleman was asked, “If given
the chance to come back as anyone, who
would he choose?  He responded, “I’d
come back as the man I could have been
but never was. I’d act with more courage
and I wouldn’t allow my fear to deny me
opportunities that I was too afraid to grasp
before.”

Don’t let your fears prevent you from
living the life you des