Unhappy with life and assaulted by Bernie gifs
The first question to be raised by a piece on the intersection between a particular fandom , and the extremely broad term “ mental health issues ”, is , quite naturally , why the two would even be linked in the first place . I ’ ll say at the outset that I expect that the premise of writing on this topic won ’ t be universally popular , and no doubt many will find it entirely unnecessary ; I fully appreciate that the majority of fans who have been enjoying the Berena storyline have likely simply sat back and appreciated the ( fairly wondrous , it must be said ) sight of two middle-aged women of equal status and ability ( as the late lamented Raf put it ) fall in love , without the need to consider any deep psychological impact , or their own psychiatric or emotional well-being …
But there ’ s no doubt amongst the contacts , acquaintances and even genuine new friends I have made amongst the fandom , that it ’ s turned out a few of us have had — how shall I put it ? — a few wrangles in the peace of mind department over the years . I have a few thoughts as to why that ’ s the case , and the impact Berena might have had in this context , and so whilst fully acknowledging that the discussion won ’ t be everyone ’ s cup of tea ( or strong and hot coffee ), I ’ m going to have a very brief crack at explaining why I believe the burgeoning romantic relationship between our two favourite highly accomplished surgeons , and struggles of the psychiatric or psychological nature might , for some of us , come up in the same conversation .
For many , it seems Berena has been a turning , or a tipping , point ; it ’ s prompted a personal epiphany for some about feelings that have perhaps previously gone unacknowledged or unexpressed , and even allowed a few in the fandom to come out for the first time . For others — and I ’ m amongst them — it ’ s been a welcome depiction of women of a certain age ( a little older than my own , but I ’ m getting there …) finding happiness with one another in a genuinely rare slow-burn story that took time to develop the characters as well as the relationship . For me personally , Berena has been a welcome reminder of the sheer fun there is to be had in seeing someone even a little bit like myself on screen ( sadly I don ’ t have a lot in common with Bernie Wolfe other than a professional qualification and an appreciation for brunettes …), but at the same time , it ’ s also provided a form of much-needed validation that arrived just when I was perhaps beginning to doubt myself , somehow — something to which , despite my best efforts , it seems I am periodically susceptible .
For a long time into adulthood , I had personally considered that being gay had afforded me a mental strength I otherwise might have lacked , especially in a family where emotional fortitude had often been at a premium . In requiring me , I felt , to “ toughen up ” to a greater degree during my formative years , in order to deal with myself and what I knew I wanted , not to mention the all-too accurate accusations from others as to who I