RISE, A Modern Guide for the Purpose Driven Woman Spring 2014 | Page 49

time they had extra large white
granny panties for me. I would
wear these underwear and this
jumpsuit for the next 3 days; day
and night. The best purpose for
the underwear is to rip out their
waistband for a hairtie; your
actual hairtie, if you wore one
in, has already been confiscated
as contraband. Showertime. 3
shower stalls with no curtain.
I was given a tiny bar of soap
about the size of a half a dollar, reportedly it contains lye, it
burns like it does and a hand
towel and told to shower and
wash my hair. The water was
ice cold. It’s the type of device
you encounter in an elementary
school bathroom where you push
it on and ithe water automatically
shuts off in about 10-15 seconds.
Once you are in your pod, you
learn to keep your spoon from
meals and lodge it in the push
button to keep the water flowing. Jailhouse shower technique.
Also, wrapping a maxipad around
the showerhead and securing it
with your jailhouse hairtie allows
you to control the water pressure; jailhouse spa. Of course,
any of those things left on your
shower or caught in your possession will get you time in “the
hole”, the solitary confinement
cell where they can keep you,
without phone calls, commissary
or human interaction for up to
90 days. Some places have a true
hole which is completely dark.
At some point in the night I was
taken to the TB Hold or “the
stacks” as the inmates call them.
A massive 4 floor room lined on
all sides with row after endless
row of jail cells, about a 1000
cells in all. My home for the next
24-72 hours would be an 8x10
grey cinderblock walled room
with two metal bunks bolted to

the wall. I was waved to a tiny
dirty room that was piled to the
ceiling with inch thick army
green plastic mats. “Grab a mat.
Move it along ladies.” It smelled
like fish, sawdust and Lysol.
“Grab a bed roll ladies. Let’s go.
Don’t act like it’s your first time.”
I took a rolled up thin blanket
from a large rolling bin of hundreds.

powder if it helped, and was
in anyway safe to actually PUT
on your skin; inmates buy it as
perfume for the outside of their
uniforms. Jail commissary products are the bottom of the barrel. Things that are unsafe to sell
to the general public end up on
commissary, which is all owned
and operated by Indian reservations. I ordered a multi-vitamin
for $7.99, only to trade it away
I was led up flight after flight of
when I read the label, “Deemed
metal stairs to a cell where myself unsafe for pregnant or breastand one other girl were waved in feeding women. Has ingredients
as the guard held open the huge
known by the state of California
metal door with a window and
to cause cancer.” Even the dollar
a slot for a food tray. I went in
store sells safe vitamins. Forget
and the girl immediately threw
being healthy in jail. It is not
her mat on the bottom bunk. “I
gonna happen.
got a bottom bunk pass.” In jail
whether you have one or not,
There was a window in my cell
you say you have a bottom bunk
but it was painted black. If you
pass, or just throw your mat on
scratch that black paint off, even
the floor and deal with the dirt
a tiny amount, you can face an
and roaches that will crawl on
escape charge which can get you
you as you sleep because the
3-5 years more time. I was in antop bunk is a thin piece of metal
other all grey room with a person
bolted to the wall about 5’ above
sleeping something off and snorthe floor. It is next to impossible ing loudly. The mirror wasn’t
to get up to and you generally
usable and for some reason not
have a view of a dirty vent 3”
being able to see your self or the
from your face which, along with outside world...not being able
your toilet, becomes known as
to see a clock or a TV or use a
the roach entry point. Roaches,
phone, just completely messes
unlike people, seem to be dywith your mind. It quickly makes
ing to get INTO jail. As I would
you go crazy in your own head.
come to find out, when you have It is amazing how with lack of a
commissary, you can coat your
good inner dialogue, your brain
walls and floor around your toilet can become a weapon against
with baby powder. A 1 oz. travel
your own self-preservation very
size bottle with cost you $1.79.
quickly. It is also remarkable
Roaches won’t walk through
how little the nasty words said
it. Apparently it sticks to their
about you consume you anymore.
feet and doesn’t allow them to
This is suffering. And it is still
walk correctly or messes up their Day One.
senses or who knows what but
it works and sadly I know this
As I have researched since, this
firsthand. Wake up a few times
is standard jailhouse control.
with a roach on your face that is
When dealing with large num2” long and you figure shit out.
bers of housed convicted crimiYou would coat yourself in baby
nals, psychological methods of