A part of my job as a health coach is to realize that I cannot be everything to every client and to help my clients find and use a variety of resources on their health journey. Such was the case with Hortense, a young woman who was a rising star in the opera world, who started seeing me as a private client because she wanted to improve her health and her body image. Hortense felt very self conscious being on public display and what should have been a celebration of her rising career as an opera singer, something she worked very hard for, became a private torture of feeling bad about herself.
At first, Hortense seemed to be doing well. When we went over her food choices, it seemed like she was making healthy decisions and doing all the right things. My instincts told me that there was something missing from the picture she was painting, and that her bouts of intense body hatred, body shame and stage fright did not go hand in hand with the eating patterns she was presenting. She told me that most days she didn’t feel like leaving her home and when she went out she wanted to put a bag over her head. Her self-hatred regarding her looks was intense. When we were halfway through her six month consultation program Hortense confessed that she was lying about eating healthily, that she was binging on sugar and junk food and that she suffered from bulimia to the point that she was throwing up 17 times a day. I was not surprised that she took so long to tell me, one of the symptoms of bulimia is secrecy and she needed time to trust me enough to share that with me. Our work moved from making dietary changes and boosting her self worth to include supporting Hortense to seek the help that she needed to heal from bulimia.
Here are the lessons Hortense learned through our work together:
~ Finding professionals she trusts and can talk to is essential to her recovery from bulimia. I recommended a therapist who specializes in eating disorders and Hortense begin therapy which was essential to her healing.
~ Secrecy only make things worse. Hortense started to talk about her experiences with bulimia with friends from the opera world and was surprised to hear other women come out and confess that they also suffer from eating disorders. Breaking the silence gave other women permission to speak up. They formed a support group and shared their stories, their experiences and healing resources with each other. Knowing she was not alone and that other women in the entertainment industry understood the pressures of being in the public eye was one of the best resources she has created for herself and her friends.
~ We started working on healing Hortense digestive system with soothing and easy to digest foods that she loved. She started drinking nourishing broths and eating fermented foods that did wonders to her ailing digestion. It was very common to see Hortense walking around with a thermal cup full of veggie or bone broth, it became her comfort food and her anchor into health. She realized she needed to take it very slow and be in a health program for longer and signed up for another six months.
~ Hortense learned that being in recovery does not mean that you are instantly healed, but she learned to focus on the fact that she was making slow but steady progress. She still experienced bulimia when we ended our consultation program but it was down to once every few weeks instead of 17 times a day. She learned to use her resources and reach out for help when she had a relapse.
I hope her story will encourage you to seek all the support you can get from as many resources as you need.