P: What advice do you have for spa
directors who are leading a team of
introverts?
C: In general, make sure that you’re getting people
the time they need to recharge, which will then help
them to be their most present selves when they’re
on. More broadly, I’m a big believer in the idea of
‘user manuals,’ which is where you ask each
employee to produce their own user manual of what
their colleagues should know about working with
them. How do they work at their best? When are
they happiest? What tends to set them off? And you
can ask for your colleagues’ help in putting this
together, because sometimes they’ll know things
about you that you don’t realize yourself. Then,
distribute those user manuals around and use them
“If you feel that you’re
being spoken over in
ways that are making
you uncomfortable, get
into the habit of
speaking from a place
of deep conviction.”
as a way of getting team members to talk to each
other and really know each other better.
P: On the flipside of that, what advice
would you have for an introvert trying to
stand out in their workplace?
C: The best thing is to do your work well, be as
present as possible, and if you feel that you’re being
spoken over in ways that are making you uncom-
fortable, get into the habit of speaking from a place
of deep conviction. Practice it in fake situations, like,
if you just watched a movie on Saturday night, tell
someone what you thought about the movie. Tell
your friends and tell them really deeply from your
gut, because if you’re talking from that place then
people will listen.
P: Lastly, if you’re an extrovert, what can
you do to empower the introverts on
your team?
C: Well, we know that in your typical meeting we
have three people doing 70 percent of the talking. So,
you want to make sure that’s not happening, you
want to make sure that you’re hearing from
everybody. If you’re making a decision, you might go
around the room and invite everyone to speak… now
you’ve heard from everybody instead of only hearing
from the most dominant people.
QUICK
QUESTIONS:
hometown: “The New York area.”
bucket list travel desti-
nation: “Oh gosh…
Morocco.”
Personal motto:
“What comes to
my mind is
‘be kind.’
I don’t know
if that’s a
mantra, but that’s the
first thing I thought of.”
ideal day off: “Exercise, work
on my next book, hang out
with my family, and
I’m happy as a clam.”
favorite color:
“green.”
favorite spa
treatment:
“Massage.”
n
aUgUSt
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