Psychopomp Magazine Fall 2014 - Page 30

30 | Psychopomp Magazine

postmodernism, travel speakers, the big ones, roadie protocols, how to set and tear down stage equipment, the best and most economic diners in all the major cities, mending black socks, black hats, black suits, the most efficient way to fry a chicken and how to toast bread over a campfire. You will earn your keep on the road.

You have a brother who is four years younger than you. He is soft and little. He is scared, too, sometimes. If not for him, you might run away. You name him Little Fucker.

Derrida is a dog lover. He loves dogs. He says, Dogs are God’s creatures but they need discipline because they are only dogs.

Derridean dog discipline:

• Beat the dog when it pisses on the floor;

• Beat the dog when it doesn’t come;

• Beat the dog when it shits in your shoe;

• Be quiet, good, obedient, respectful;

• Always urinate and defecate in the proper places.

Life can be a predictable set of dog lessons.

Send a letter to Saturday Night Live. Address it to Eddie Murphy even though you are supposed to prefer Mr. Rogers over Mr. Robinson. Mr. Rogers is an unshakable obligation of moral conservatism. Mr. Rogers is a good guy and loves children. He goes to church. He wears loafers and sports jackets and parts his hair in a respectable way. You are a Pavlovian morality to Mr. Rogers’ respectability. You are a big ass dog. But you have always thought: Il n'y a pas de hors-texte—i.e., no one is ever that good.

A Study of Messrs. Rogers and Robinson in Binary Oppositions:

Sports jacket, collar, tie, flat front trousers, loafers / army field jacket, T-shirt, jeans, patent

leather platforms;

The proper position for a fork beside a dinner plate / how to use a fire escape;

Married, middle class, white, male retiree in suburban, single-family home / divorced, poor, black man in urban apartment;