The (Not So) Good Old Days
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match the guests’ experiences with the dominant narrative. A man who claims to
be “ex-gay” speaks from the audience. He says the reason he is gay is that his
mother was an alcoholic and he often saw her lying around drunk and naked
when he was a child. The audience rightly rejects this homophobic (and
illogical) explanation of homosexuality. Ricki chastises him for implying that
people can choose to be gay. The next guest, however, is a woman who has been
married three times to men, and then left her latest husband for a woman. She
says she didn’t want men in her life ever again because of their drug abuse and
physical violence toward her. She decisively describes her evolution as a
conscious one: “I decided I didn’t want any more men in my life.” Ricki is not
satisfied, and challenges her, “Well, are you sure you’re really gay, or are you
just fed up with men?” The woman replies, “I’m fed up with men and I’m totally
committed to her, so if that means I’m gay, then I guess I’m gay.” The audience
seems dissatisfied, but after some momentary rumbling, their attention turns to
the next guest, a man who’s distraught because his sister broke off all contact
with him when she found out he’s gay. Ricki explains how he should educate his
sister: “There’s a lot of misconceptions out there, like that you choose to be
gay.” The man responds with the obligatory, “I wouldn’t choose ridicule.”
This episode exemplifies how talk shows operate on a system of logic that
is unable to deal with any understanding of sexuality other than a biological one.
Unsure how to deal with a non-biological account of lesbianism, the audience
and the host simply gloss it over. The woman didn’t recite any of the usual
childhood explanations or give