Coping with Holidays
Holidays and other special anniversaries can be
very difficult after a loved one has died. Rather
than being a time of family joy and sharing,
holidays can bring feelings of sadness and loss.
No simple guidelines exist that will take away
the hurt or the renewed sense of grief that you
might feel during these special days.
Here are some suggestions to help ease the pain:
■ Consider changing a tradition or creating a
new one to honor the holiday. Have a dinner
or toast with friends and family to celebrate
your loved one’s memory. Don’t be afraid to
cry or to laugh.
■ Visit the cemetery or memorial site. Plant a
tree or make a donation in your loved one’s
memory.
■ Attend a prayer service or donate flowers to
your place of worship in his or her memory.
■ Do things because you want to, not because
they are expected. Avoid things that cause
you stress. Take time to care for your own
needs.
■ Forgive yourself in advance for enjoying parts
of the holiday. This is not a betrayal of your
loved one.
■ Embrace your memories. They are one of the
legacies that exist after the death of a loved
one. Instead of ignoring the memories, share
them with family and friends.
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