FEBRUARY 2017 PARKER COUNTY TODAY
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Buying The Dress — Great Expectations and 5 Missteps To Avoid
BY MARSHA BROWN
There are moments in every woman ’ s life that she has dreamed of years and years before it happens . Shopping for a bridal gown is one of those . For most women , the longer they dream about a life event , the more stressful it is when the longed-for occasion arrives . My mother essentially eloped when she married my father . My grandmother ( the mother of the bride ) was something of a piece of work who didn ’ t want her youngest daughter to marry someone she didn ’ t choose . My mother had “ no walk down the aisle ,” as Springsteen would say . She had no bridesmaids , no bouquet . She did have a deliriously happy 53-year-long marriage .
Expectations were high for me . My parents wanted me to have a great wedding , a dreamy gown , bridesmaids and all that my mother didn ’ t have because my grandmother was in a snit when my parents got married .
By the time I planned my wedding , both my mother and me had so many high expectations about it that my mother got her feelings hurt by something I said or did , that at the last minute she refused to go wedding gown shopping with me .
My father went with me . He was the John Wayne type you ’ d never expect to see in a bridal gallery but he got a kick out of all the attention from the staff and we had a grand time together . It was great . Perfect , in fact . The most important lessons I ’ ve learned from the kazillion weddings I ’ ve been a part of , is not so much what to do , but what not to do when choosing a wedding gown . The top five are :
1 . Shopping Too Early Lots of couples are choosing longer engagements . If yours is the proverbial 5-year-long engagement , don ’ t start shopping one-week into it . Do not set foot into a bridal salon until six to nine months before the big day .
Have everything else planned , have the date , the invitations , the venue all in place before you set out for your gown-shopping adventure .
But , don ’ t put it off too long , either . Some gowns take from three to six months to come in .
2 . Going Gown Shopping With An Entourage I know , it ’ s the most important dress you ’ ll ever buy , and it must be the perfect dress , but the presence of a dozen other females won ’ t make this decision any easier or any more fun . Electing your bridal gown won ’ t make it any more wonderful ( then there ’ s the question of whether you want an electoral college ). Most likely , you ’ ll wind up with someone else ’ s idea of a dream gown . It ’ s your day . It ’ s your gown . One best friend and maybe your mother are perfect . More than two is a crowd . How many voices do you need to chime in ?
Most brides do best with just their mom and maybe a sister or best friend , said Debra Lash , of The Wedding Tree in La Crosse , WI . “ They generally have the bride ’ s best interest at heart , not what they want her to wear .”
3 . Don ’ t Set Your Heart On One Certain Style It ’ s fine to peruse bridal magazines and find a style you like , but until you actually try gowns on , it ’ s hard to say how if it will be great on you .
4 . Buying a Gown You ’ re Not In Love With Bringing along a friend or family member that has very strong opinions or working with a bridal salon staff member that is very persuasive .
If you find yourself falling for a dress , if you ’ re feeling pressured from a friend or relative , or a salesperson is pressuring you to buy a certain dress , it ’ s okay to go home without a dress .
5 . Trying On Gowns Out Of Your Budget
You see a fabulous gown on display . It ’ s way out of your price range . Why not just try it on ? What ’ s it gonna hurt ? Right ? Wrong !
Have you ever had a friend that had a $ 15,000 wedding budget but wound up spending $ 25,000 , then started her marriage deeply in debt ? She ’ s very likely someone that tried on a $ 3000 gown with a $ 500 gown budget . Don ’ t start out on the wrong stiletto .
Set your budget before you set out for the bridal salon and stick to it .
Then only do business with people that respect your budget . It will build character . It will also make you happier with the gown that you can afford .