It ’ s something we at RelationshipDevelopment . org hear ALL the time .
● I ’ m already doing this work . They need to do it , too .
● I don ’ t need this . My partner does .
● They ’ re the one who needs to change .
IT ’ S EASY TO SAY THAT AND TO THINK THAT OUR PARTNER IS THE PROBLEM .
“ It ’ s time we stop trying to change our partner and realize that our partner isn ’ t the problem .”
– STACEY MARTINO
RELATIONSHIPS
But it ’ s only when we stop playing the blame game that we start doing something productive for our relationships . It ’ s time we stop trying to change our partner and realize that our partner isn ’ t the problem .
You are the only one you can control . And you are the one who can make a change . You are the one who can lead your family in the right direction !
MY PARTNER IS THE PROBLEM
We recently had someone come to us with this exact problem . She was working through our 14-Day Boost Program and got to the part where we teach alignment .
She posted in our Facebook group and said , “ Ok , this is great , but how do I get my husband to listen to this ? I ’ m already putting him first . He ’ s putting his family of origin first . How can I get him to listen so he can figure this out ?”
Now , plenty of people would think she was right . She ’ s here , she ’ s doing the Boost , she wants to work on the problem , and her husband is off doing his own thing and being selfish , right ?
But here ’ s a truth bomb for you : even if it ’ s true , even if you are the only one doing the work , your partner doesn ’ t need to hear it from us .
YOU ’ RE IN THIS TOGETHER
It ’ s our natural wiring to say , “ I ’ m not the problem .” We are so trained in ‘ Demand Relationship ’, it ’ s so deep in our blueprint , that it ’ s hard to even recognize when we ’ re doing it .
When we blame our partner and make them the problem , we step right into Demand Relationship where it ’ s win / lose . But your relationship is not You vs . Them . There is no me and them , there ’ s just Us .
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