page 14
NE W S
Thinner
continued from page 7
he suspects of cheating on him with their doctor
(though I don’t know if this is actually the case; I
think all these gypsy curses have gotten to Billy’s
head). Sure enough, he gets her to eat the pie. She
dies. Unfortunately, his daughter eats it too (we
don’t see her die, but that pie is instant death so
it is safe to assume she died). As his final act of
insanity, Billy eats a piece of pie with the possibly
cheating doctor, presumably killing them both.
So it was a happy ending, I guess. Oh, the
morality thing: don’t have sex in your car while
you are driving, and don’t be jealous of moderately attractive doctors who have a friendly relationship with your significant other, and also try
to avoid serving Death Pie to your daughter.
I guess it’s also important to not be so critical of yourself: being thin doesn’t equate to being
happy, so be happy with yourself, even if you don’t
look exactly how you’d like to look. Because it’s
better to be overweight and a successful lawyer
than thin and a cursed, sociopathic murderer.
Thinner isn’t a great movie, and I’d be inclined
to say that whoever made this movie knows as
much about film-making as I know about lintroller manufacturing. But I did enjoy it, and I’m
sure you would too.
Spring/summer
2014
continued from page 10
it. You definitely don’t want this heavy piece to
drown out the rest of your outfit. The picture
provides an example of how this look can be
pulled together. Because it can take a longer time
to pull the look together, save it for the weekend
or a night on the town.
So mesh-y
I find this to be a functional alternative to the crop
top. You can easily control the amount of skin you
show by selecting the right tightness of knit for
you. Therefore, this piece is extremely accommo-
dating and should be added to your closet if it’s not
in there already.
There you have it Ozzies: a quick summary of
the trends dominating this season. But no matter
what’s in style, you should never let it compromise your own taste. Wear the clothes that please
you and don’t let your own inner fashion queen be
silenced. And although this has not been proven
(yet!), satisfaction with your outfit contributes
to better exam results. Yes, that totally makes
sense.
York Lanes
continued from page 9
of Thrones-style winter. The self-serve homemade
casseroles and salads are obvious winners. Why is
a similar buffet not available at Osgoode’s bistro?
So that’s it. Our glorious arrangement, which we
never dreamed the Obiter would accept, has run its
course. It’s been a great experience, and we want
to thank you, dear readers, for your kind feedback
and hearty chortles at our expense. Remember:
stay healthy, stay hungry, and don’t forget to tip
your server. *rides off into sunset*
p i c tu r e d ( Le f t t o r i g ht ) : the v a r sit y j a c k et a n d the te a l en g th s k i r t.
THUMBS UP to. . .
Copy Editor Patricia Wood, for her exceptional knowledge of punctuation.
The Obiter Dicta