NYU Black Renaissance Noire Winter 2014 - Page 93

This is What Pornography Leaves Out the first time I saw your eyes unguarded you were sneaking a look at me — the freckles golden in your feline, olive eyes, your chinaman  whiskers black against smooth white skin, plump cheeks, heartshaped birthmarks red & hot like the forehead of a fevered newborn. I saw in your eyes: I was your lover but also your mother & you were the lost boy, feet bowed-out with scurvy, broken compass, no ship, lost sailor, bars were your mermaid sirens & I could feel you moving inside me low-tide, trying to make me love you by making love  to me, taking solace in this womb because the last time you were safe  you were inside a woman & every moment after birth has been hell  & no matter how much you false-laugh, I couldn’t forget that lost look of a child  that would come over you when your whole body jerked it’s salt release, just 91 BLACK RENAISSANCE NOIRE hold me, your eyes would beg and how sad the low-whine fear of a toddler alone in a Hong Kong market, his family left him, see how quickly he cries.