NJ Cops Oct18 | Page 93

HEALTH & WELLNESS When living hurts so much that suicide becomes the only option, we have failed our brothers and sisters We are not going to sit here and talk about the primary and sec- ondary dangers associated with the work we do. We have read and heard it a thousand times. We are not here to quote statis- tics or tell you that we have found the answer, because we haven’t–pri- marily because there is not one an- swer. What we hope to accomplish by writing this article is raise aware- ness about how precious and fragile each and every life is. Life is not a dress rehearsal; for most of us, we have one chance to get it right. If you’re fortunate enough, you might get a second chance. We are not judges, although like you, we have judged. Rather, we believe that if we had a road map to well-being, life might not become so burdensome that for some, the only answer is suicide. Our goal is for you the reader to think about what YOU can You Worked Hard to Advance Your Career. Don’t Lose It All in Divorce. Our Attorneys specialize in: • Divorce Planning • Prenuptial Agreements • Alimony • Custody • Child Support • Pension Distribution • QDROs Find Out What You Can Do to Protect Your Pension and Your Right to Retire. We are a Full-Service Divorce and Family Law Firm providing legal representation, consulting, and mediation. Call us for a free consultation, whether you are planning the wedding or just thinking about a divorce. We can help you devise a plan to protect your future. The best time to protect your pension is before the wedding! Our legal team is ready to help you formulate a plan to protect your rights and interests. Schedule your initial consultation today! NJ Divorce Solutions – Previte Nachlinger, P.C. 120 Wood Ave South, Suite 602, Iselin, NJ 08830 732-384-1707 www.CentralJerseyFamilyLaw.com 92 NEW JERSEY COPS ■ OCTOBER 2018 do to make a difference in the life of someone else. Lifesavers can’t always save themselves In the past 10 years, we have been touched in one way or another by more than 150 first responder suicides. These are the people who save lives — they’re not supposed to take their own. After a while, you almost become emotionally numb to it. How sad is that? Our heroes see the horrors of life. Yes, they have also expe- rienced the joy of saving a life, etc., but it’s the horrors that leave an imprint in our minds. Far too often, we find ourselves replaying scenes that won’t stop or shut off. When it’s time to sleep, the relentless movie projector in our mind turns on, re- fusing to stop until exhaustion sets in. Secrets don’t help When we facilitate therapy groups with first responders, we often say, “Secrets will keep us sick. It’s easy to talk about what we want to talk about, but real healing comes when we talk about the things we don’t want to talk about.” The shame and guilt we carry will eat at the very fabric of our soul and charac- ter if we don’t find a way to free ourselves from these feelings. Can what we say make a difference? As we ponder the chronic and alarming suicide rate among our heroes — police officers, correctional officers, firefighters, military and other first responders — we can’t help but won- der whether we all are missing something. We ask ourselves, why are our heroes killing themselves at an alarming rate? Why do they wind up in such a dark place that the only relief from the pain is to end their lives? Is it obvious or a disguise, deceiving all of us? It’s obvious to the one contemplating suicide, yet those nearby often remain clueless. Has life gotten so busy that we don’t even have time to talk or spend a moment with a friend? Are we so wrapped up in ourselves that we can’t even recognize the pain of oth- ers? Are the signs so obvious that they become normal to us? If only we had asked the question, “Are you thinking about killing yourself?” Would that have made a difference? Maybe, maybe not. But how would we feel knowing that at least we had asked? Those left behind are often tormented by questions that perhaps will never have an answer. d Michael Bizzarro, Ph.D., LCSW, is the clinical director for Princ- eton House First Responder Treatment Services. Ken Burkert is the senior outreach coordinator. For information about Princ- eton House’s First Responder Treatment Program, call Dr. Biz- zarro at 732-771-7165 or Ken Burkert at 908-346-1691 or visit princetonhouse.org/firstresponders.