New Jersey Stage 2015 - Issue 10 - Page 66

seems intent on making us feel bad for enjoying horror movies by giving us a story completely devoid of what’s generally considered a good time. What those film-makers fail to get through their judgmental heads is that we don’t get off on the violence, we get off on the fear. The ascent of the rollercoaster is far scarier than the descent - it’s the fear of what’s around the next corner, what’s making those noises behind that door. The real terror isn’t on the screen, it’s in the thick fog of our psyches. The dentist’s chair is never as terrifying as the dental appointment. Because it relies so much on lighting, framing and camera movement, horror is the most cinematic of all genres and requires real talent to make it work. Here the lighting is abominable, the framing nonsensical, and movement consists solely of shakey-cam. For some bizarre reason we are constantly treated to the backs of character’s heads rather than their faces. The director doesn’t seem to understand that acting is in the eyes, not the ears. Zombie, arrogant in the way only musicians can be, displayed zero talent as a film-maker, yet somehow got to make a sequel to this disaster. Few were surprised when his Halloween turned out to be a cinematic travesty. ½ star out of 5 2015 - ISSUE 10 66