New Church Life September/October 2015 | Page 26

new church life: september/october 2015 ourselves to act in a friendly way, even if we don’t especially feel like it, it sets the stage for the Lord to work within to restore the love. We cannot change our feelings, but we can take actions that allow the Lord to stem the flood of the hells, so that the genuine love within can re-emerge. (Conjugial Love 271) And even if efforts to be a friend do not save the marriage, they still prepare the individual for an eventual conjugial relationship. Ideally, friendship – as the face and garment of love truly conjugial – enriches and brings an inmost joy to people. Or, as the Heavenly Doctrines state: “If friendship, love of the married partner, love of children, reigns in common in any society, then every single thing they think, speak and do is joyful.” (Spiritual Experiences 2415) As we strive to become better and more selfless friends, sometimes forcing ourselves to act against our baser feelings, something precious grows inside. An opening to the Lord creates a union of souls and a joining of minds – and that can take place and be felt more and more in our lives. This is the promise of an inmost friendship (Conjugial Love 180), said in the Heavenly Doctrines to be the “friendship of friendships,” (Ibid. 334) or “conjugial friendship, which surpasses all friendship.” (Spiritual Experiences 6110:49) As we work at becoming a better friend to our spouse, a conjugial friendship will become a genuine face and garment of that intense and eternal love which the Lord is giving us. It will promote that deeply formative and satisfying genuine love in marriage, allowing a couple to grow closer forever. For they “who so dwell together on earth dwell together as angels after death.” (Arcana Coelestia 2732) Indeed, then the joy of dwelling together increases in this world and will in the next forever. So our marriages will become the source of the deepest and the most intense happiness that we can ever experience. This is the promise of love truly conjugial – a precious gift from the Lord that He is ever offering to us. Amen. As we work at becoming a better friend to our spouse, a conjugial friendship will become a genuine face and garment of that intense and eternal love which the Lord is giving us. 458