supposed to take this literally and actually hate our family. (Secrets of Heaven
10490, Apocalypse Explained 724.5) What it means is that we should hate the
evil inclinations and dysfunctional patterns that we inherit from our family of
origin, and hate the selfishness within ourselves from which hurtful intentions
spring. When we give up those evils we can love our family in a genuine,
spiritual way.
In a sense charity begins at home, since we have to take care of ourselves
and our family in order to be able to be of service to others. But if charity ends
at home, it really isn’t going beyond love of self. (See New Jerusalem 97-99) To
love only oneself includes loving one’s own family and friends to the extent
that they go along with one’s selfish desires. (New Jerusalem 66, 67) To love the
neighbor is to treat others as true family according to the good that is in them,
regardless of their relationships or benefits to oneself. (See True Christianity
431)
The Lord set an example in giving the priority to one’s spiritual family.
When He was told that His own mother and brothers wanted to talk with Him,
He replied, “Who is My mother and who are My brothers?” And He stretched
out His hand toward His disciples and said, “Here are My mother and My
brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father in heaven is My brother and
sister and mother.” (Matthew 12:48-50, Mark 3:31-35, Luke 8:19-21; see also
Matthew 19:29, Mark 10:28-30, Luke 14:26) In a similar way He invited John,
His disciple, and Mary, His mother, to be a spiritual family to each other. (John
19:26-27, Apocalypse Explained 9:6, 250:8, 785:5, 821:7, New Jerusalem 122)
During the Lord’s ministry He sometimes preached to thousands, He
sometimes ministered one-on-one, or even went off by Himself to pray, and
very often He worked with small groups. He called 12 disciples, sometimes
meeting with all 12 (as at the Last Supper), and sometimes just with Peter,
James and John (as in the Garden of Gethsemane).
Often he would eat at someone’s home, ministering to the family and
friends who had gathered. When he healed the 12-year-old daughter of Jairus,
He wanted privacy and allowed only seven people in the room. Small groups
of friends gathered in someone’s home were a vital part of the Lord’s ministry,
and when He sent out His disciples, it was two by two. (Mark 6:7, Luke 10:1)
He said, “Where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in
the midst of them.” (Matthew 18:20)
Early Christians
After the Lord’s coming into the world, representatives ceased, and the church
was no longer divided into families by natural blood relationships. Instead,
relationships in the church were based on spiritual connections. The church
continued to be based on family relationships, but as a spiritual family, not a
genetic one. (See Secrets of Heaven 5598)
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