MotorPunk October 2013 | Page 45

Drivers would have to drive at a speed sufficient to create sufficient downforce not to fall off, I would suggest perhaps a minimum of 20mph for passenger vehicles, 30mph for vans and 40mph for HGVs. There will be some costs associated with adding the steel structure above, at least £75 if my numbers are correct, so perhaps you could increase the crossing fee by around seventeen pence per vehicle to fund the work. For extra fun, perhaps you could move the payment booths to the top of the loop and place them upside down, this would have the additional benefit of turning your staff’s frowns upside down into smiles. I am quite sure people would pay seventeen pence for this alone. I would be happy to meet to discuss this project further and look forward to your response. Yours sincerely, B. de Catgune Mr Boris de Catgune. PS – I have also started work on an improved design for the tunnel section, involving log flume apparatus salvaged from the disused “American Adventure” amusement park, near Stokeon-Trent. 45