MOST Magazine Fitness APR-MAY'15 ISSUE NO.1 | Page 110
TROY BYER
By: Darcy Tharp
“In order to ‘not lose yourself’ it
is important to participate in activities that we
personally enjoy – with or without our partner’s
involvement. It’s also important to simply have
alone time.” That’s the advice of the “Heartbreak
Recovery Specialist” Troy Byer, who is talking
about how to not to lose ourselves once in a
relationship. She points out that merging identities
happens quite often when insecurity is present,
so it is imperative to stay true to what you love
doing on your own. The best-selling author, actor,
director, and producer has a multitude of insights
into relationships and how to heal after heartbreak.
Troy got her start as an actress appearing in a
number of movies and TV roles, and later gained
her knowledge into breakups from her own
personal experiences. She has since gone on to
counsel countless others and make a career out of
writing, producing, and giving advice. Not only is
she talented in the writing and film world, but she
already has her MA in Depth Psychology and is
currently studying to earn her doctorates degree.
With her second book on the way and the release
of her film on DVD and digital download coming
out in April, Troy is constantly excelling in many
areas. When asked what she enjoys the most of all
her various projects, she responded, “I love it all.
The most important thing to me is that whatever I
am doing, it must be consistent with my brand’s
intention and that is to “empower and inspire.”
ell, empower and inspire she sure
does. Troy can be seen as regular on
the Steve Harvey show giving advice,
offers her own one-on-one-guidance, and even
holds heartbreak recovery counseling (HRC)
sessions. She says that she’d love to be doing it
even more often and dreams to one day have HRC
meetings be as widely available as AA meetings.
“I am a firm believer that no one should ever have
to suffer alone. The suicide rate is so sad, and I am
literally moved to tears when I think of the absolute
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pain one has to be in before deciding to take his or
her life. If I could, I would just give the entire planet
a big hug.” That is exactly why Troy is loved and
revered by everyone who comes into contact with
her. And it is easy to understand why, as she only
desires to help and motivate people to be happy.
Her personal experience with divorce is partly
where she gained her understanding and realized
the need for others to learn how to heal their heart
in order to move on and find happiness again. She
divulges that, “After my husband and I divorced, I
chose to only acknowledge the great things about
him. And as a result, we both experienced the pain
caused by breakup, but very little suffering. My
knowledge is derived from years of research and
working with individuals suffering from heartbreak.
Neuroscience has a lot to say about heartbreak
and the literal impact heartbreak pain has on the
body, specifically the brain.”
Thus, she wrote down her action plan for how
to be free after heartbreak and turned it into an
Amazon best-selling self-help book entitled, “ExFree: 9 Keys to Freedom After Heartbreak.” The
book contains practical practices for releasing,
healing, and transforming lives – something that
Troy is used to doing as an everyday superhero,
rescuing scores of people from the throes of
heartbreak woes! Asked to describe the most
memorable in her career thus far, when she
knew that she had changed someone’s life, Troy
described a divorced couple she worked with who
absolutely could not be in the same room for more
than five minutes without bickering. “Their anger
was actually hiding their sadness. Once we dealt
powerfully with their sadness, all that was left for
them to say was ‘I love you, I will always love you.’
They spent the next two years re-creating their
relationship as parenting partners and shared
several wonderful holidays together. I was very
proud of the results we were &