Months To Years Fall 2018 Months To Years Fall 2018 - Page 37

Cancer Notes of a Caregiver Spouse: That First Stay in the Hospital By Meg Lindsay n n I remember the tall computer stands the nurses looking as miserable as me, hot in spite of the hospital wheeled from room to room, and how every few hours A/C, having to go through each drug in detail, they asked my husband for his name and date of complicated five syllable names loaded with ‘x’s and birth, and I remember being glad I wasn’t responsible ‘z’s.   No one had told me I would be responsible in for such complicated things as drugs that might save order for him to be released, and that later I’d have to his life. create a spreadsheet to keep it straight. I don’t remember his three consecutive roommates n I remember restless nights, my heart thumping too as they were all loud and only a curtain away, but I fast, that 10th day going back twice into the dim light do remember the annoyance of my husband, who of Sam’s Club, the long walk on a hard, concrete survived in spite of their keeping the TV on 24/7. floor through boxes of children’s diapers and porch furniture and plastic plants, clutching the corrected n I remember when the first roommate moved out and prescriptions to override the phoned-in mistakes.  I I hastily solicited the head nurse to claim the now remember panicking, not finding someone to help empty bed by the window, illusion of space with its move the heavy sofa so the hospital bed could be view of the tops of trees he could see looking up from delivered. his pillow to the vastness of blue sky. n I am not sure I remember the first time I had a sip of n I can’t remember the names of the twenty-some drugs that beet and lemon ginger smoothie in the lobby of the attending physician enumerated, standing next to the new cancer center as I waited for my husband to my husband’s bed, late that 10th day in the hospital; complete his first, or was it the fourth, day of radiation she, Eastern European with a thick accent that was while his younger brother, a 61-year-old CEO from hard for me to understand, and we, both tired. She Virginia, did business on his cell.  I do remember it cost 37