Mission Beautiful Australia {MBA} Magazine MBA Issue 1 March. 2014 | Page 56

LETS TALK ABOUT THE CYCLE O CYCLE OF VIOLENCE NE WOMENS TRIUMPH IN BREAKING THE CYCLE AND LEAVING A MENDED FAMILY LEGACY. HOW SHE TAUGHT HER CHILDREN THAT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IS NOT NORMAL OR ACCPETABLE. The cycle of violence is viscious, it creeps up on you like a disease. After you have been isolated from family and friends because of it, TCV can lead you to despression and even suicide .even in some cases murder The term cycle of violence refers to repeated and dangerous acts of violence as a cyclical pattern, associated with high emotions and doctrines of retribution or revenge. The pattern, or cycle, repeats and can happen many times during a relationship. Each phase may last a different length of time and over time the level of violence may increase. The cycle can happen hundreds of times in an abusive relationship. Each stage lasts a different amount of time in a relationship. The total cycle can take anywhere from a few hours to a year or more to complete. It is important to remember that not all domestic violence relationships fit the cycle. Often, as time goes on, the ‚making-up‘ and ‚calm‘ stages disappear Family Legacies INTERGENERATIONAL CYCLE OF VIOLENCE – VIOLENCE THAT IS PASSED FROM PARENT TO CHILD, OR SIBLING TO SIBLING. CHILDREN EXPOSED TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ARE LIKELY TO DEVELOP BEHAVIORAL PROBLEMS, SUCH AS REGRESSING, EXHIBITING OUT OF CONTROL BEHAVIOR, AND IMITATING BEHAVIORS. Domestic violence if left to its self in the dark it will thrive on fear and violence CHILDREN MAY THINK THAT VIOLENCE IS AN ACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR OF INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS AND BECOME EITHER THE ABUSED OR THE ABUSER. AN ESTIMATED 1/5 TO 1/3 OF TEENAGERS SUBJECT TO VIEWING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SITUATIONS EXPERIENCE TEEN DATING VIOLENCE, REGULARLY ABUSING OR BEING ABUSED BY THEIR Fear as a child was my constant companion. I grew up in a large family consisting of 2 adults, 5 boys and 3 girls. In this home we all bore wittiness to and were victims of years of sexual, verbal, mental and physical abusive domestic violence. My step farther was a very violent and unbalanced human. His abuse done grate harm to not only his victims, there is far reaching consequences to this abuse. I left home as soon as I could. because of the domestic violence my foundations for life were shattered. As a young woman the fear stayed with me. I met my husband when I was 17 once we 56 married he started drinking more and more with the alcohol came violence. I fell pregnant with my first child Nicole at 20 and had my son at 22 by then I was hearing about domestic violence more and more about the effects on children. That day I decided to get help and went into intense counseling. It took many years to unravel the poison of domestic violence on my journey, my marriage broke down and I found myself raising my two children alone. It was the most amazing time of my life. I also told my children of the abuse I grew up with and what happened to me. Domestic violence happens in secrecy PARTNERS VERBALLY, MENTALLY, EMOTIONALLY, SEXUALLY AND/OR so I made sure that my kids new what it was and never put up with it for any reason. The more I read I empowered my self and with this knowledge came not fear but anger and with that anger the man that inflicted so much pain on me as a child had to face the justices system and was jailed for 2years and the best thing is he has a record and he has to live with it every day!!! It took 5 years but to tell my kids that he went to jail for what he done was the best message I could give them on sexual, verbal, mental and physical abusive and domestic violence. By Tania Farrelly PHYSICALLY. THIRTY TO 50% OF DATING RELATIONSHIPS CAN EXHIBIT THE SAME CYCLE OF ESCALATING VIOLENCE IN THEIR MARITAL .RELATIONSHIPS Doust Photography MBA | MISSIONBEAUTIFULAUSTRALIA.COM MARCH 2014 57