MADE Maven October Issue MADE Magazine - Page 64

MADEUS is two fold. Not only do I have pressure from social media to always be relevant, to make moves, to be successful and engaging, but I also have pressure in real life to have it together and be an example. I’m a leader at my church, my husband is a pastor, his parents are the pastors of our church, my parents have their own church. There’s a lot of pressure to uphold a certain standard and people are always watching no matter where I go! So I have to take time for myself to really make sure I’m emotionally and spiritually stable. This year more than ever I’ve had to find my secret place and get closer to God on my own without all the voices in my ear. I’m trusting God with it, and I can't let anything or anyone else distract me from his plan for my life. How do you handle the negative comments? Most times I just shrug it off because I know many of the people who are negative online would never say any of those things to my face. Twitter fingers only work online. They talk big in all caps but would never attack me in real life. Plus they don’t even know me, so their opinions flawed and they’re only opinions, not facts. I know who I am, but sometimes the words do get overwhelming. The times where the negativity did get to me, I was not in a good space emotionally. I spent way too much time in my own head, focusing on myself. Around that time I was in a vulnerable situation and I had to realize that my life and everything I do has a greater purpose, not to please myself, but to help others! I constantly remind myself I don't just do this for me. If it means I can help someone be a better them, I’ll take the jabs! It just makes me stronger. Has there ever been a time when you felt like you shared too much with your followers? I’m an over thinker, so of course at times I think really hard about what I’ve put out there and if it was a good or bad decision. Once it’s out, you can't take it back! But at the same time, being open and honest with my followers only works in my favor because then they can relate to me, it may help someone, and we can share experiences. I appreciate when people I follow and look up to share parts of their lives that may have been tough for them, because it helps me get through tough times where I may have felt alienated. So when I do share, I make sure there’s a purpose for it and I’m not doing anything disrespectful to anyone, including myself. That’s when it becomes too much. Have you gotten used to people recognizing you when you’re out? Do you | 64 ever feel pressure to look nice all the time because you never know who you may run into? I’m used to being recognized but when people start screaming or crying, that I never get used to! It’s strange because I don't see myself as a celebrity or famous person, so I feel like I’m nothing to cry about! On the other hand, I grew up loving fashion and dressing up so I personally just like to look presentable when I go anywhere, even if no one sees me. I may not wear heels to the grocery store but if I’m out and about, it’s an opportunity to look cute! I have way too many clothes and shoes, so I try to take advantage of those opportunities. The world is my runway! I can imagine there are times that you just don’t feel like making videos or posting pictures. How do you get through those tough moments? The pressure to be “on” all the time is draining. I get through those moments by simply letting them happen. I’m a strong believer in rest and taking a break. Especially as women, I feel like we put way too much stress on ourselves sometimes. We tend to worry and get anxious, and if you let those feelings fester they can grow into serious health problems! We have to find the time to take the edge off and recharge. And then once you’re done recharging you can be more effective and