Love U Magazine BnW Issue, Winter 2017 | Page 15

Models (left to right): Tiffany Hill, Bridgett Johnson, Kaila Uli, Ashley Alzate, Aneesha Madhok, Samantha De Galicia, Deonna Tillman, Jas Monet, Hannah Christina, Zohra Hussein, Madeleine Shelton Photographer: Nick Ramsay on losing weight, which consisted of daily cardio and limiting my intake of food. I tried to find ways to grow taller, keep my skin clear and make myself look like the idolized, blue-eyed and blonde-haired girl. My looks became an obsession that consumed my entire life and it made me hate myself for who I am not. Casting directors would exclude me from being booked because I was not a size 0, 5’8” or an “all American” girl. I was always considered too Asian, or not Asian enough, and put into this category that suppressed other parts of me. People would make remarks about Asians which made me feel like I needed to think, act, and look a certain way to fulfill the stereotypes. ust being Asian in the modeling industry can already be perceived as a disadvantage and I shamefully resented my racial identity. Every ounce of my being was judged by many, and to J