Looking after someone 2017, England | Page 8

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Keeping relationships fulfilling
“ I was suddenly juggling hospital visits , a full-time job and trying not to scream . I remember feeling I had lost all control over my life : that stroke had happened not just to Peter , but to both of us .”
Caring for our loved ones can express the best of who we are , and can take a relationship to a profound new level . It can also push us to the brink through financial , emotional and practical strain . Illness can cast aside the best-laid plans and make relationships feel utterly different . What matters most is that there ’ s a way for us to talk honestly and find help when we need it .

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Adapting to changing circumstances
Whether we ’ re looking after someone who ’ s recovering or whose condition is deteriorating over time , caring inevitably involves adapting to circumstances .
Sometimes it ’ s easy to focus on the practical details – the administration of care workers or move to the care home . Being able to stay attentive to our relationship with the person we ’ re caring for in the midst of all that change is far from easy .
“ There were times when it seemed that mum was at death ’ s door . But a couple of days later she was sitting up in bed , bright as a button . That really made the emotions difficult , constantly living on the edge .”
Looking after someone carersuk . org