PRECIOUS WORRIES:
HOW STRESS MAKES
YOU BEAUTIFUL.
S
by Monica Karst
tress is rampant in our busy
modern lives. Every person I
meet, when asked why she or
he wants to meditate, replies,
“to be less stressed.”
Of the many helpful meditative
approaches to stress reduc-
tion, one powerful way to
reduce our stress is to be beau-
tiful. “Beauty” here does not
mean physical beauty, as we normally asso-
ciate with the word. Here, beauty means
accepting one’s humanness. Acknowledging
the joy and pain of being human, one is
beautiful. One becomes both strong and
tender, able to feel deeply and still partici-
pate in life.
How does this kind of beauty reduce stress?
First of all, it is based on kindness. When
one is kind toward the difficulties of being
human, the symptoms of stress—a tense
body, worry in the face, tightness in the
voice—lose some of their strength. Try this.
Bring to mind an image of yourself, with all
your dreams and all your challenges. Imag-
ine offering kindness, encouragement, and
understanding to yourself, just as you would
to someone else who you love dearly. Feel
this kindness as mental images, pleasant
emotions, and soothing physical sensations.
Allow these experiences to soften your heart.
This warmheartedness is kindness, which is
beautiful.
Secondly, this beauty is based on revealing
our true heart. So many of us hide ourselves.
We may suffer a lot, we may feel great joy,
but we are too proud or too afraid to show
anyone this side of us. When our inner pain
and inner joy are kept secret, the heart
becomes so heavy. On top of the everyday
stresses of life, we carry this hidden stress.
But every human being has struggles and
successes, just like us. To show this side of
ourselves lifts this weight from the heart. In the
presence of someone you love and trust, try
telling that person what you are really facing.
If our pain is too personal to share, we can
also imagine someone who cares for us
unconditionally; let that person know all that
we have been going through. Imagine
that person comforting you, offering his or
her love. The stress will lessen. We are
beautiful because others can see our
humanity, and by that, show their own
humanity as well.
Lastly, this beauty is based on being there
for our life. This means to be willing to
experience what life offers, including the
range of human emotions and the situa-
tions we find ourselves in. Though exter-
nally we may need to be strong and in
command of our life, inside, we can
soften to life’s mystery and uncertainty.
When we are there for life in this way, we
are beautiful.
We are less resistant. Too often we are
just the opposite: we fight with our busy
minds and wild emotions. But right within
those thoughts and emotions is spacious
relaxation. If we breathe deeply, become
aware of our bodies, and focus our atten-
tion on this inner quietude, our stress lifts.
Try this right now and feel the space it
creates. Life may not be perfectly the way
we want it, but there are hopeful possibili-
ties, hidden in plain sight, in ourselves
and in the life around us. Stress has given
us a precious opportunity to be kind, to
show our true heart, and to be there for
our beautiful lives once again.
Jordan Leahy, MA, is a spiritual teacher
ordained in the tradition of Anam
Thubten, Rinpoche, (dharmata.org). He
is the founder of The Living Mantra (the-
livingmantra.com), a meditation training
community in Santa Cruz, California.
Based on twenty three years of medita-
tion, study, and translation with numer-
ous spiritual teachers, he teaches medita-
tion as a way of seeing the poetic beauty
and deep meaning in everyday life.