Life Without Conflict Life Without Conflict | Page 130

Life Without Conflict
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Dadashri : What can you do if he does not calm down?
Once you say this to him, you are free, what other solution is
there? He will calm down someday. You cannot soften the other
person by telling him off. He may appear to have calmed down
but from within he makes a mental note of it and will throw it
in your face when you least expect it. So understand that his
world lives on vengeance. The fact is that people will continue
to harbor vengeance; they retain atoms of revenge within so you
must try to resolve the situation completely.
Adjust According to Their Prakruti
Questioner : What should I do if I try to break the
silence by asking for forgiveness from the other person but
instead, he reacts even more negatively?
Dadashri : Then you should not say anything to him. If
he has the misconception of, ‘The one who gives in is a
weakling,’ then you should stay away from him. Then, whatever
happens is correct. However, resolve everything with those
who are straightforward and easy to deal with. Can you not tell
who in your household is easy to get along with and who is
difficult?
Questioner : If the other person is not straightforward,
should we sever the relationship with him?
Dadashri : Do not sever it. Worldly interactions are not
such that they will break by you breaking them. You should just
remain silent and then one day he or she will get angry and bring
about a resolution. If you remain quiet, then one day she will get
angry and ask you, “You do not say anything anymore. You
have not said anything for so many days.” When she gets angry,
you will resolve things. What else can you do? There are so
many different types of iron; I can understand them all. Certain
types of iron become malleable when heated while others