KNOW, the Magazine for Paralegals Spring 2014 | Page 26

KNOW End

Business Etiquette
When is a pat on the head taboo?
QUESTION:
Recently, Estrin Education received a communication from a reader expressing her discomfort when a coworker pats the head of a client’s child.
MY RESPONSE:
Our increasingly global society yields many benefits, one of which can be a greater understanding and
appreciation for other cultures and customs. But what happens if a custom from your culture is prohibited
in another? For many people, it can be surprising to learn that a behavior they associate with warmth and
affection is considered rude and/or taboo in another culture.
Such is the case of the practice of head touching in Western culture. Many westerners fondly remember
grandma, grandpa or even the friendly stranger affectionately patting our head or tousling our hair. Perhaps we’ve done it ourselves and reached out to touch the head of someone’s adorably cute child, an
act that is meant - and seen - as a sign of approval or even love. So for many of us, myself included, it is
quite surprising to learn that touching the head of another person can be a sign of bad manners in Asian
cultures. In many Asian cultures (especially those in the Southeast) the head is a sacred body part as it is
believed that the soul resides in the head. Random head touching just isn’t done.
Even I will admit that trying to remember the different customs of other cultures can sometimes feel overwhelming, but this one is easy. Regardless of your cultural beliefs, it is inappropriate to touch the head of a
client’s child. Period.
Common business courtesy dictates that the children of clients be treated as you would treat the client - if the child is old enough to shake hands, greet the child and extend your hand to shake. If the child
shakes your hand, fine. If the child declines, don’t force it, and don’t touch any o \