On the Coast – Families Issue 96 I October/November 2019 | Page 35

Your infant
There were long and heated
discussions with well-meaning family
members, isolation, little contact with
friends and family and a husband
working two hours away, I was clearly
a time bomb of emotions about to go off.
At that point I realized that rocking our
baby to sleep and breastfeeding every
hour, every night was getting to be too
much for myself and my family.
I realized that there are gentle ways
that I could help, her to get off to settle.
I have always connected with our
babies by using eye contact even whilst
trying to or in the process of settling
them down to sleep. Eye contact creates
trust. I would always just close down
my eyes, as I would pop them into their
cot or bassinet whilst taking some deep
breaths. You can try this by inhaling
through your nose and then exhaling
through your nose, do this up to three
times. I would be patting their belly
gently or just have my hand resting on
there as I was doing so. I have always
found that this would help to create the
calm space that I needed and in turn so
did they.
You can also try using gentle music ie.
Lullabys with a 3-4 beat rhythm which
is similar to your resting heartbeat. You
can play this for a week whilst rocking
your little one to sleep and then the next
week wait until they are drowsy then
put them down to sleep. Once they’re
used to the music being their association
for sleep hopefully they’ll be able to
settle quickly once put down into their
cot or bassinet. This will take as long as
a snuggle bed to put
a few weeks for your
needs a loving,
between you both or
baby to settle into a
responsive interactiion move the bassinet to
new rhythm with
be right next to you
their sleep or maybe
always. This is an
and the bed.
just a week. It is all
essential foundation
Dr William Sears
dependent on your
a
renowned
unique baby. It might
for connection
American
help to remember
and building
paediatrician has been
though that an
quoted to say ‘often times
expectation in your infant
trust
I felt ridiculous giving my
‘self-settling’ once earth side
seal of approval to what was in
may not happen because it is a
reality such a natural thing to do, sort of
developmental milestone for them to be
like reinventing the wheel and extolling
able to recognize night from day.
its viruses. Had parent’s intuition sunk so
Co-sleeping. This is a controversial
low that some strange man had to tell
subject and at times opposed in western
modern women that it was ok to sleep
society. ‘We are moving toward an
with their babies?’
artificial, mistrustful, and distant
When babies sleep near their parents
approach, especially in the western
we are creating a sense of trust and
world.’ As quoted by Jan Hunt author of
security for them, acceptance and love.
‘The Natural Child, parenting from the
Lastly, when in self-doubt, ask
heart.’
yourself is it safe? Is it respectful? And
Quite simply though, safe co-sleeping
does it feel right intuitively for you? 
saved my life and my sanity! Because
If you answered yes to any of these
when you as a mother sleep next to your
questions, then do what feels right for
baby you are more able to use your own
you because that will ultimately be what
instinctive responses that every new
your baby needs.
mother has, it is a very similar instinct to
And if there is only one thing that you
your reaction to your baby’s first cry.
take from this I want you to remember
Practical Tip: If you are worried about
that- Sleep is only a problem if it is a
placing your infant between yourself
problem for you and your family.
and your partner you can always use
Nikki Smith is a Registered Nurse and a Qualified Child and Family Nurse. A mama of three beautiful
daughters with a strong belief in raising our children consciously and intuitively. Nikki is the founder of
Earthway Parenting andhas developed and is facilitating Post Partum Care and Tuning into your Toddler
Workshops. Nikki also provides in home, one on one consultations according to the unique needs of your
family focusing on gentle parenting for your infant and/or toddler. You can find more information here
www.earthwayparenting.com.au
OCTOBER/NOVEMBER – ISSUE 96
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