On the Coast – Families Issue 98 I February/March 2019 | Page 19

reconnect) to your little one’s behaviour,
this is you OWNING your ‘reaction.’
A simple but effective way to OWN
your reaction can be as simple as to
apologise, to go down to your child’s level
and apologise for the way that you reacted.
This alone can be incredibly empowering
for your child. BUT also empowering for
you. This is ultimately about you taking
responsibility for your own actions, AND
you teaching your child to do the same.
Within the ‘Tuning into your Toddler’
workshop we run through different
exercises and scenarios so you are able
to better grasp situations that will have
you ‘react’ rather then ‘respond.’ It’s an
important part of your unique parenting
journey learning tools to better handle
upset in intense situations, so that you
are able to create less tension and a more
harmonious home.
By doing so it will also allow for a
discussion to take place, and ALWAYS
create the space for renewed connection,
as well as an opportunity for positive
role modelling. Your actions and words
as a parent, as an adult, create far more
Instead of
thinking to yourself,
that we can reach that
of ourselves
‘I really ‘should’ have more aspect
and become MORE
patience’ perhaps it would of who we are, more
of what we want to
be a better alternative to
become, today.
look at the ‘why’ for
‘This is the
understanding that
your reaction.
your child has come to
meaning than the
‘lectures’ and
discussions that you
will ever have.
We ALL feel
somewhat guilty for
how we have reacted
to a situation with our
toddler but by staying
stuck in your guilt it is like
saying “I am all mighty and
powerful I make everything turn to
chaos alllll by myself!” Therefore, the
mistake, and/or action that has taken
place, is just a small part of your story. It
doesn’t define you. Your mistakes are not
the definition of who you are as a person.
As a parent. Forgive yourself and let it go.
As a mum, no matter where you
are on your parenting journey the
new reality with our precious child/
ren can make us feel like we are ‘losing’
ourselves. In fact, it is the complete
opposite, being a parent gives us the
opportunity to find more of ourselves.
It can give us a chance to seek out the
depth of who we are or who we were, so
teach you and allow you
to grow as a human being.
Parenting will bring you to the core of
your ego, always. Our children trigger us
because they are ours. “I will be the best
parent,” “ I will be the best mother,” every
time we fall short of these expectations
our children then trigger us – but what
our children are really doing is showing
us a mirror to our underdeveloped self.”
Dr Shefali Tsbary.
Let’s get real, we are a slave to time,
we live with an obsession of ‘getting stuff
done,’ we are always building something,
learning something, achieving
something. ‘Doing!’
When we slip into this notion of
thinking it is too easy for us to pull our
cont. next page
FEBRUARY/MARCH – ISSUE 98
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