On the Coast – Families Issue 93 | April / May 2018 | Page 33

are ok to sit there but after a certain point we become more bored, distractable and restless. Our concentration wains and if we don’t get a break or change we become more agitated. Crying is one state we are all familiar with. This is your baby’s way of saying I have had enough and it is time to stop what you are doing and help them calm down. Babies can only really learn to calm themselves by being comforted from someone else initially, then build the internal skills to calm themselves over time. Babies cry for a whole lot of different reasons. They may be hungry, tired, uncomfortable, scared or feeling insecure or overwhelmed. Crying usually becomes more frequent around 4-6 weeks of age and then starts to reduce in frequency as they learn more coping skills. As adults we don’t tend to burst into tears every day (although some days this does happen). We do tend to become more reactive and not cope so well with stuff when we are tired. Maybe be a bit more snappy, less tolerant. Note: You cannot spoil a newborn baby (or adult) by responding to them when they cry. Research shows babies whose parents respond quickly and sensitively to their crying actually cry less and become more secure as adults. No one sleeps well when feeling stressed. If you are feeling overwhelmed yourself, it is ok to take a short break and get back on top of your emotions. Make sure your baby is in a safe place. Take some slow breaths, call a friend or supportive family member, or have a drink of water. Your baby is not going to settle while you are feeling that way because they are tuned into your emotional state to evaluate risks to their own safety. From their perspective, if you are worried or stressed about something, and you are their life support system, they ought to be worried too. So take a break, get calm, calm your baby then help them sleep. Note: Never shake or rock your newborn baby with force, as this may cause damage to their developing brain. If you are worried about the amount that your baby cries or about how your baby’s crying is affecting you, talk to your early childhood nurse or GP. Know your baby’s state This will help you understand their temperament as well as support their development. When you know what state your baby is in you can then do things to help them move through them more easily. To wake a sleepy baby you could try these things: ƒ ƒ Remove the blankets or wrap or undress them/change their nappy. Get close to your baby’s face and talk gently, changing the pitch/tone of your voice. Change your baby’s position by picking them up or sitting them up. To help your baby to calm down you could try these things: ƒ ƒ Hold them close, talk in a slow steady voice, stroke their face, head or back, rock, pat, shh or sing to your baby. Give your baby something to hold, like a finger or toy. Get familiar with things that work for your baby. Support your baby’s developing efforts to calm themselves. Look for things your baby is doing like sucking on their hands, fingers or tongue, bringing hands to mouth, focussing on something, especially if it is someone’s face. Notice and comment to them on what you observe and how clever they are. This will reassure you and your baby… Jan Rourke is a Registered Nurse, Midwife, Child and Family Health Nurse as well as a certified counsellor and Hypnobirthing practitioner. Based on the Central Coast, with a background in perinatal and infant mental health her focus is on promoting a positive experience of pregnancy, childbirth and early parenting and securely attached infants. Ph 0407 733 484, facebook.com/4babyandyou; www.4b abyandyou.com.au Everything you need for home or holiday. Why buy when you can hire it! Hire from our huge range! • Child Car Restraints – for all ages • Baby Carriers (Front) • Backpacks • Bassinets • Bed Rails • Booster Seats • Bouncers/Rockers • Breast Pumps & Dopplers • Capsules • Change Tables • Entertainment Centres • Full Size Cots • High Chairs • Jogger Prams • Monitors • Play Pens • Porta Cots • Prams & Strollers • Stair Gates & Swings • Tens Machine • Travel Systems • Twin & Tandem Prams Central Coast – Erina 02 4017 0121 [email protected] www.hireforbaby.com APRIL/MAY – ISSUE 93 33