Kalliope 2015 | Page 159

All this while Monica topples onto your bed totally oblivious, taking off everything but her bra and panties like it is just you and her and the door isn’t still wide open. You pull your face away from the kiss, and when Megan opens her eyes she looks deeply insulted. “Whatever,” she says, stumbling back a little. “Fucking DTR, like I even care about… Monica hates you anyway, you fucking creep. Monica hates you anyway.” You believe her. Monica has that right, and probably exercises it. You don’t take it too personally though. Monica hates herself more than anybody else – that’s in fact why she joined a sorority. Not to say that’s why everyone does it, but she told you herself that’s why she did. Not for sisterhood, but to rebrand herself. To reinvent the reality she lived in – one she has never talked about with you before. Ever. “Safety in numbers,” she said that first night you met her two months ago, in this very room, before she gulped down yet another fruity drink. You start to think about all signs you looked right over in these two months with Monica. The fact that she drinks like a Lost Generation writer. Her inability to converse or have sex with you while sober. The fact that, after all this time, you haven’t heard anything about a friend she